posted less than an hour ago on the register
Config file deletion knackered 110 branches A former employee of Citibank has been sentenced to 21 months in prison for crippling the bank's internal network.…

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posted less than an hour ago on the register
Anonymizing tool team concludes investigation and fires two others Web activist Jacob Appelbaum humiliated, intimidated, bullied and frightened numerous people in the internet community and subjected others to "unwanted sexually aggressive behavior."…

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posted about 2 hours ago on the register
You can't get internet there, but Giant Red Spot is clue to 'energy crisis' Jupiter’s Great Red Spot may be responsible for stirring an atmospheric hotspot into a frenzy, causing it to be hundreds of degrees warmer than anywhere else on the planet.…

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posted about 3 hours ago on the register
Net failure forces humans to 'manually' feed ravenous pooches and pussies Outage ALERT  Humans have been forced to temporarily interact with their dogs or cats - perhaps both - after PetNet’s smart feeder system suffered a blackout.…

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posted about 4 hours ago on the register
Alliance is to splurge cash on plethora of new hardware and software Anti-Soviet defence pact NATO's IT division wants to award €3bn (£2.5bn) worth of “cyber, air and missile defence” contracts, spanning everything from buying new keyboards to improving space satellites.…

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posted about 5 hours ago on the register
One gift from God (a) man did not want to see A church organist is due before the beak next month after he allegedly thrust his pink pipe through a glory hole in excelsis and “waited” for someone to make sweet music.…

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posted about 5 hours ago on the register
You don't even need to know web design to be a baddie Cybercrime miscreants seem to be flocking to a one-stop online web business shop.…

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posted about 6 hours ago on the register
Nicola Sturgeon’s home county stalked by angry Struthionforme Residents of Ayrshire are living in fear of a marauding family of ostriches that have mysteriously appeared in the usually quiet Scots region.…

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posted about 6 hours ago on the register
And sent Constable Ned Kelly on an 11-week training course to use the things Essex Police has announced it is using polygraph tests on convicted criminals – in its own words, “to help manage the risk posed by convicted sex offenders.”…

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posted about 7 hours ago on the register
Total Inability To Support Usual Per... one server? Heart Internet has restored service to customers whose email has been titsup since Monday, with users unable to use the service due to a single server failure.…

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posted about 7 hours ago on the register
Don't worry, outsourcing giant is still doing a roaring trade Outsourcing giant Capita has hinted that the UK's decision to leave the EU will have an impact on its bottom line, while recording a sales increase of 5 per cent to £2.4bn for its first half-year results.…

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posted about 8 hours ago on the register
New non-linear view poses threat to cosmic order Some crazy and terrible things have happened in 2016, but none can be more shocking than Microsoft PowerPoint adding a quite useful new feature for presenters. The ubiquitous slide presentation software has finally made a break with linearity.…

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posted about 8 hours ago on the register
Processor design nets £100m in last quarter for Cambridge-based biz Cambridge-based processor design business ARM has posted substantial revenue and profit increases for the months in the runup to the Brexit vote.…

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posted about 8 hours ago on the register
Chimera cybercrook competitor hands victims the keys Private keys of the Chimera ransomware have been leaked by a rival cybercriminal.…

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posted about 8 hours ago on the register
Last quarterly results before the great Cavium slurp commences In its last quarter as an independent company, QLogic grew revenues 2.6 per cent and profits by 700 per cent in a year. Its future lies inside Cavium and it has to deal with a declining Fibre Channel business.…

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posted about 9 hours ago on the register
You don’t always have to do everything yourself. Really There are some bits of computing that you just don’t want to trust other people with. They’re just too sensitive. But at the same time, there are some things that people can do as well or better than you, for a lower cost.…

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posted about 10 hours ago on the register
Yahoo, DNC emails and, er, business cards

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posted about 10 hours ago on the register
The difference between doing it and saying you're doing it After roughly 20 years, agile software development has wheedled its way into most every developer's mind as The Way Good Software Is Done. Like flossing, while we can all agree agile is a good idea, we're not quite up to snuff on keeping all our teeth in our heads, so to speak.…

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posted about 11 hours ago on the register
Layered chippery leading to potential SSD capacity doubling Western Digital, via its acquired firm SanDisk, along with Toshiba, has started pilot production of 64-layer 3D NAND.…

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posted about 11 hours ago on the register
Sure you want to rely on 'digital' to plug slashed jobs? UK MPs have warned that HMRC (HM Revenues and Customs) may struggle to overhaul its expensive £10bn IT systems with Capgemini, and that further cuts could ultimately waste more taxpayers' cash.…

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posted about 11 hours ago on the register
Explo-Xen ... it rhymes with explosion Code dive  A super-bug in the Xen hypervisor may allow privileged code running in guests to escape to the underlying host.…

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posted about 12 hours ago on the register
19th century optics gets the 21st century treatment NASA Goddard boffins and engineers have taken inspiration from the Fresnel lens to craft a “photon sieve” they hope will help them observe the processes that heat the sun's corona.…

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posted about 13 hours ago on the register
Remote 'complete account compromise' possible, Google hacker finds A dangerous zero-day vulnerability has been found in popular cloud password vault LastPass, which The Register has been told can completely compromise user accounts.…

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posted about 13 hours ago on the register
Four unpatched bugs remain after nine found Nine security holes, four of them still unpatched, have been found in the Osram smart light bulb system, potentially giving attackers access to a home or corporate network.…

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posted about 14 hours ago on the register
VXer mass posts to Reddit in sorrowful bid to make a living The eager-but-pwned net menace behind the JigSaw ransomware has been found targeting Reddit users with multiple malware in a bid to snare victims.…

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