posted 3 days ago on metafilter
Found a car I like that is listed, as a certified vehicle, with a certain price on the dealer website. We negotiated a price to my liking, I had a mechanic check it out and right before I was going to sign, the sales manager said they would *add* a certification fee. I walked out. Should I reconsider?So.. I decided to pass on this car and ended up finding another one to my liking two weeks ago. However, negotiations went south and I walked out. Now reconsidering, as they've lowered the price, but I'm not sure how to proceed. Here's the deal: 1. The car is a used 2013 vehicle listed as "Certified Pre Owned" with internet price X on the dealer website. The certification is a brand warranty (not a dealer warranty). I am paying in cash, which of course means that the "special internet price" is not the price they *want* to extend to me. I ignored this and used the internet price in negotiations. 2. The internet price was about the same as the NADA clean trade in value. I negotiated that price $200 lower, after taking the car to a mechanic and realizing the tires weren't in great condition (Mechanic pointed out that there were two different brands of tires on the car and the tires "*just* pass a state inspection would need replacing in a few months). I wanted more off the car, but they wouldn't budge. As this was the only identifiable issue with the car, I decided to move forward. 3. During the selling of the car, the certified status of the car was never in question - the salesman described it as already certified, the website described it as already certified. However, once we wrote up the final buyer's contract, I noted that nothing on the contract said the car was certified, as we'd discussed, and that I would not sign until there was a stamp indicating "[Insert Brand] Certified Warranty]. 4. At this point, the sales manager comes out and transforms what had been a very pleasant experience into a very unpleasant one. He claimed "I never said the car was certified." I countered: "Your salesman did and it's listed on the internet as certified. The price we negotiated includes this certification." He then said "Well, it *can* be certified", making it clear that this would mean tacking on an additional fee. At this point, I told him that the deal was off and walked. As I did so, he said I was crazy for thinking I could find a better price anywhere else, and I told him he was crazy for losing a customer. Cue violins. So, two weeks later, I now see that they are advertising the same vehicle on their website for a full $600 less than the price I'd negotiated (which was already $200 lower than the price the sales manager said he absolutely could not go below, as he would be "selling the car under value" [absolute b.s., I know, which is why I walked]. Here are my (interrelated) questions: 1. If the car is advertised as Brand Certified and we negotiate a certain price, doesn't that price *have to* include the certification, given that it is already certified? Can they list a car as certified but then try to sell me that same vehicle without the certification? Can certification be "un-done"? Can a car that was previously certified be sold as a car that is no longer certified but "can be certified for a hefty fee"? What would that even mean? 2. Does the certification come from the Brand and not depend at all on the dealer? The first time around when I walked out, did I actually need them to put a stamp on the buyer's contract affirming that the car was Brand Certified? I suspect I did, but I want to be sure. 3. What kinds of questions do I need to ask (or what demands do I need to make) to make sure I don't get screwed over with the certification side of things? 4. Was the sales manager's tactic (of trying to tack on certification as an additional fee on top of the price we negotiated) normal in the world of used car buying, or in fact a shady business practice that should disqualify that dealership from doing business with me? 5. If I do decide to go back, how should I proceed with negotiations? The price they are now listing is lower than I would have paid before, even if they tack on a certification fee, it would be within my budget, but out of principle, I would simply want to pay the newly advertised low price, with no "extra certification fee", and take this car home.

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posted 3 days ago on metafilter
If I get a prescription from a doctor and take it to a pharmacy, they seem to be able to fulfill it there and then. How? Do they keep a stock of all drugs on hand? Seems unlikely but I have yet to visit one and they didn't have the stock. How does it work?

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posted 3 days ago on metafilter
What books reuse all or part of the text of another book? I'm looking for works like Pride & Prejudice & Zombies, or A Humument, or F***ing Frankenstein, where large chunks of text are transformed but are still recognizable from the original. I am not looking for books like Wicked or The Wind Done Gone, where the story or characters are used but text is entirely original.Oh, also, I should probably mention that I'm not looking for instances of plagiarism-- I'm looking for works that are completely honest about their use of the original text. Thanks!

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posted 3 days ago on metafilter
Excerpts from Guy Debord's "The Muppets." "Though the name 'Guy Debord' is now synonymous with two things: Situationist philosophy and The Muppets, this pairing of passions was not as easily reconciled as you might think. 'I had to fight really hard not to be pigeon-holed as a Marxist theorist in the puppeteering community,' Debord once said. 'They told me 'Kids don't want to hear about how the concrete life of everyone has been degraded to a speculative universe, Guy.' I said 'How about we let the children decide that?' Decide they did..." [Previously, Via]

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posted 3 days ago on metafilter
In the American version of his autobiography, Klaus Mann uses the metaphor of Jupiter and Minerva to talk about his maternal grandparents. In the German version, he changes this to Jupiter and Juno. It seems that Jupiter and Juno are married (but are also siblings. ick), while Minerva is basically Jupiter's daughter, so Juno is a more appropriate goddess to name in the metaphor. Am I missing something?I'm trying to work out whether this change is merely a result of fact checking and realising that the husband/wife relationship of Jupiter and Juno is more accurate when talking about his married grandparents, or whether there's some significance to Minerva in the German context or Juno in the American context that would explain why he made the change. I'm really unfamiliar with Roman mythology, so any links to good resources are especially appreciated! Thanks

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posted 3 days ago on metafilter
This is a 'tap the judgment power of the hivemind' question. About a year ago I bought an old house (1920s) in a 'gentrifying' neighborhood in Saskatoon. On July 1st I discovered that the basement rug and drywall were soaked: I had the basement finish ripped out down to the studs and discovered several large cracks in the foundation. I need to repair this if I want to stay, but I can't decide if it's worth it, or if I should just move. Based on what's within, what do you think?My foundation is damaged, and it will need to be fixed. The first engineering firm said that I need to either completely replace the foundation (jack up the house, disconnect everything, dig out the old foundation, pour a new one and let the house back down). This is about 80-100K and takes 2 months at least and I can't stay in the house while it goes on. The alternative is to pour new walls inside the old: this will cost about 50K and will take a reasonably long time, but can be done while I'm in the house. I just called a second firm to get their opinion: if they agree with the first firm, then I'll know what my options are. The problem is this: I like the house, but the neighborhood has problems (gangs, dealers, hookers) all of which are getting worse than they have been, according to the neighbors. For illustration: my city has had six murders this year, and two have taken place within three blocks of my house. Much of this place is great: my neighbours are very nice people and I very much like the people who live here (young families, artists, academics -- the place has a funky vibe) but I wasn't aware of the amount of crime, and it's bad enough to give me pause. I've lived in lots of 'crappy neighborhoods' before, as a tenant, but still -- it's bad enough that I wonder. This didn't bother me that much initially. I wasn't planning to try to sell anytime soon, and I expect that the property values in this little town will drop dramatically -- I chose to buy where I could afford to buy outright because I'd rather lose half of 300K than half of 800K with a 500K mortgage. But the idea of putting another 100k (which I will have to finance) into an area that might be declining, not improving, changes things. If I sell (I'd lose a big chunk, probably 30K, if not more) I would still have to finance, but I could probably buy something in a better neighborhood for 400 or 450 K. I love this house: it's vintage and funky and quite, quite lovely. I'd wind up in something with much less charm. What say you? Go or stay?

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posted 3 days ago on metafilter
How do you get rid of furniture in Oakland?My wife and I have a long coffee table we want to get rid of. Googling seems to lead me to believe that the best answer is the random Oakland trash day when they accept large items or calling a very expensive trash service. How can I best (and most cheaply) get rid of this table as soon as possible?

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posted 3 days ago on metafilter
Fictional Characters Whose Lives Would Have Been Vastly Improved By An Abortion (SLToast)

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posted 3 days ago on metafilter
Effects on libido, dosage, other factorsI was prescribed Lexapro for social anxiety and GAD which is fairly mild (I am functional and enjoy my life but have some hang ups), but which is very long-standing and I'd be curious to see what effects medication have. I am in CBT already. The psychiatrist I saw prescribed 5mg per day, which I understand is a low dosage. I haven't started it yet. I am also in a new relationship, which is going very well and in which I'm really enjoying the intimacy and the sexual aspects of the relationship. I think in general I have a pretty high libido, but I was going back and forth on whether or not to start the Lexapro because I've read about the sexual side effects, which seem to be decreased libido and inability to orgasm. I'd be really bummed if those became applicable in any significant way. I can probably deal with a slight decrease in libido because I probably have some to spare but in general I very much want to continue to be aroused by and enjoy intimacy with the person I'm seeing. I think my questions are: 1. In a new relationship, there's sort of a surfeit of lust and sexual chemistry. If I started an SSRI would all the lusty brain chemicals be likely to override the libido-related side effects of the drug or vice versa? 2. What is the likelihood/extent of sexual side effects on SSRIs at low dosages in particular? 3. If you took Lexapro for anxiety, especially mild-moderate anxiety, was it worth it?

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posted 3 days ago on metafilter
About a month ago I applied for a job, but was then told that the company had been put under a hiring freeze. They recently posted another interesting looking job opening; do I bother to apply?Last month, I applied for a job at Acme Co. in Department A. Earlier this week I received a call from Department A's manager, telling me that although I was a strong candidate, the company was recently put under a hiring freeze and there would be no further action on that job posting. This seemed unusual on Acme's part, but may be explained by the fact that a mentor of mine has ties to Acme Co. and may have mentioned me to Manager A. Oh well. The day after speaking with Manager A, Acme Co. posted an interesting job opening in Department B. So what's going on? I figure that either: a) the job posting is part of Acme's HR procedures and may be a dead end; or b) I misunderstood Manager A and the hiring freeze is only within Department A. (Also possible: Manager A was misinformed; or the hiring freeze was lifted.) So now I'm wondering if I should still apply to the new job in Department B and whether I should get in touch with Manager A about it. Manager A may have absolutely no idea about what goes on within Department B, but on the other hand, if she really thinks I'm a strong candidate this could help me in my application (assuming the company is actually hiring). Thoughts?

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posted 3 days ago on metafilter
My wife's Nexus 4 has died (due to an accident) and we are looking for a replacement. The Nexus 5 would be the obvious choice but is out of stock in the Play store (and given that the Nexus 6 has been announced may not be coming back). What should she get?The Nexus 4 was perfect for us (I have one too). $350 for an unlocked smartphone that could handle whatever apps were out there. What is the equivalent device now? Is there such a thing? We're in Canada and on Wind Mobile (HSPA 1700). She'll be out of the country until January so we have until then to get the replacement.

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posted 3 days ago on metafilter
We just moved into a brand new house that we love, but one of our cats peed in the basement and its making the entire house smell awful!Our basement is finished. It has a carpet. One of our cats peed down there and we've tried a bunch of stuff to get the smell out, but nothing seems to be working. This weekend we had the basement professionally cleaned and even that didn't work. It was really humid this week, and the smell was worse than ever. Is there ANYTHING that gets the smell of cat pee out of carpets? We're going nuts over here. Any suggestions you have would be amazing.

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posted 3 days ago on metafilter
Hi--I'm writing a short story in which the main character is an EMT. I would like the scene to be realistic, but I'm not an EMT. I'm specifically interested in how EMTs talk to each other on the scene of an accident.I am writing a scene in which my EMT is called to an accident where two teenagers have flipped an ATV (one is non-conscious and one is wounded and combative). I've done a Google search and found some medical/emergency lingo but none that is specific to what I'm interested in. For instance, is there lingo for the first examination of a patient on scene? Is there lingo for immobilizing patients that would be used on the scene of an accident (I saw one site refer to "board and collar") ? I realize there may not be any lingo for these actions, but knowing that would be helpful too. Thanks!

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posted 3 days ago on metafilter
Fariha Roisin: let me love you I wasn't so much shocked as I was angered by what she said—which is hypocritical of me. I know the feeling of what she was trying to describe. I had felt it many times, too. It's that feeling that only one girl in the room can be the "prettiest," as in if I was inherently attractive, she; the other, juxtaposed against my beauty, suddenly wasn't. I had never understood why I have felt that way. I just knew that I did. I can remember a variety of stinging instances when someone complimented a woman before me and how I, always, immediately felt it was a ploy to criticize my own failures. That by virtue of this other woman writing a good piece of criticism; or this person having an amazing skirt; or shoes, or dress—I didn't/couldn't/hadn't, I was a slob. This is a social illness. At least it has been in the social climate that I've lived, and surrounded myself, in. We are casualties of the patriarchy, and by virtue of osmosis, I was taught to dismantle those around me, the women— vying only for male appreciation. We don't question why we do it, we just do. It is a product of being socialized to feel as though constantly, we're not enough. As women, mothers, daughters, wives—we're constantly at war with ourselves. When I get angry with the woman complimented in front of me—how much of that does it say about me? How much do I value myself? [...] All of the hate stems from a disillusioned society that places men on top for being alive, and women are the ones that have to struggle to be constantly validated in the workplace, by their friends, peers, boyfriends, parents, shrinks. No wonder we can't give each other a break, we're terrified of not getting one ourselves so we snatch what we can from whomever we can. Dog eat dog. Bitches eat bitches. Except, no. Except what if we just didn't do that anymore? Melissa McEwan (Shakesville): Female Friendship Myths TV Tropes: Not Like Other Girls Tavi Gevinson (Rookie): Getting Over Girl Hate Roxane Gay (HuffPo): How To Be Friends With Another Woman Sady Doyle (Tiger Beatdown): Girl Culture and the Race to the Bottom: About that Rant About Women But when we talk about how women are taught not to self-promote, or believe in themselves to the extent necessary to self-promote, or the language whereby women race to the bottom on their way to the top, well: we can't take how women train other women out of the equation, in my opinion. Women can be primary agents of enforcing misogyny on each other, and women can be supremely effective at eviscerating or draining or punishing other women's confidence. Tracy Moore (Jezebel): The 'Cool Girl' Is Not Fiction, But a Phase Molly Lambert (This Recording): Can't Be Tamed: A Manifesto A.J. Conroy (Autostraddle): Female Friends Forever: Looking at Adrienne Rich's Lesbian Continuum, 30 Years Later previously on MeFi - *transformation and transcendence: the power of female friendship *femslash friday at The Toast: Rory and Paris, the real Gilmore Girls *"I was one of the guys. I was always one of the guys."

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posted 3 days ago on metafilter
I recently had a job interview at a perfect-for-my-current-circumstances employer. I thought the interview was okay but I could've done better. Didn't hear a peep for two weeks. I received an email this Tuesday asking if I could come in this Wednesday, Thursday, or Friday to interview for a different and higher-paying position. I'm looking for some advice on how to handle interview #2 tomorrow. Confusion & mitigating circumstances inside!I've been off the ol' career track for 2 years now, due to an extended period of Bad Things which is now behind me. I'm beginning to look for jobs again, and applied for this potentially awesome job. This employer hits all of my requirements for non-evil-employment (per my last job-related question) and I would be pleased to work for them. They invited me in for an interview, and although it went well enough, I was a little rusty interviewing-skills-wise. I fumbled a bit on two important questions, and didn't think I "shone" much wits-wise, although that could be chalked up to interview-nerves. I brought a nicely representative portfolio of my work, had a few good stories to tell, and I have a strong background with some relatively unique areas of expertise. I had a sense that I connected well with the interview team on a personal level. (It was enjoyable as far as an interview can be! I honestly liked all of them.) I've got some awkward spots on my resume and some negativity at a previous employer because of how I handled the situation when the period of Bad Things had just started. So, I followed up my interview with a thank-you email and a very "delicately" worded explanation of the events w/o going into excessive detail. I was up-front that if they contacted Most Recent Employer that I might not get a good reference, but it was definitely a situational thing. I made clear that I knew I had made some mistakes and I took full responsibility for them. I emphasized my education, experience, and references and hoped that they would look at the big picture. I received a polite reply from the HR manager and no reply whatsoever from the other two people I interviewed with, and then I heard nothing about the position after that for two weeks. I was bummed at not getting a response, but just figured I'd move on, until this week! I assume that my background check cleared, although they haven't called my references yet. This position I've been invited back to interview for isn't even posted on their website or anywhere else yet. The HR person knows my relevant info relating to the background investigation stuff, so I feel like I've got that covered. They contacted me Tuesday and wanted to know if I was available to interview this week for it. (?!) The HR manager did say that they filled the original position with a different candidate. I think I'll be interviewing with a different department manager vs. the last time. The manager for the first interview did seem to be very impressed with my skill set and I am assuming that's what's led to this 2nd interview. I'd like to do well in this 2nd interview, because they have a great benefits package, and it would be interesting, challenging work. It'd definitely help me to both "rehabilitate" as well as move my career up a notch, and I could see myself happily working there for quite a long time. I've never been in this type of situation before with an employer. Is this last-minute business a bit odd, or should I take it as an encouraging sign? Should I consider interview #2 as "an extension of interview #1" or strictly as a separate thing? Any suggestions for handling the discussion of my previous work history? Thanks!

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posted 3 days ago on metafilter
Schmanciest hotel pool in London?Two Americans staying in London for a midweek night, anniversary surprise for Mr. Machine, who badly loves (a) schmancy pools and (b) schmancy hotels. We've been looking at the One Aldwych, but I'd love to know if there is an even schmancier one out there.

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posted 3 days ago on metafilter
I lived in Chicago for years and generally come back pretty often, but somehow it's been over a year since my last visit. What new/newish restaurants, bars, and attractions — new within the last, say, 18 months — should be at the top of my to-do list on my upcoming trip?Other than sports bars, I'm open to just about any style of venue, and honestly, if it was like a really fun sports bar, I'd probably enjoy it anyway. For these purposes, cost is no object as I am still in the fantasy-planning portion of the scheduling. I'll be staying in Boystown, but can get just about anywhere.

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posted 3 days ago on metafilter
[Posting for a friend] I am trying to make a career change from finance to tech. Lots of special snowflake details inside.I am in the middle of trying to make a career change. My work history is in finance / real estate. Until recently I worked for a large real estate investment fund. I was really unhappy at that job, and the stress of it triggered at least one, maybe two, major depressive episodes. After seven years doing it, I have no interest returning to finance / RE. I have spent a long time contemplating my next career move. I think the tech field is where I will be happiest. Ever since I was little I've had a strong interest in technology. In high school I dabbled in learning C I was very interested in reverse engineering. I had bootlegged copies of Numega Soft Ice and IDA installed. Technical manuals from Intel on the x86 instruction set, from Microsoft on the PE file format. I was, in short, a huge nerd. And I was very lonely. In college I decided to be someone else. I discontinued my hobby and I pretended to be ignorant in computers. I had conflated being interested in computers with being lonely. As I had wished, I did form some great friendships. Wall Street at the time was on fire, so I imitated one of my good friends and decided that I wanted to be an investment banker. Nevermind that I don't care that much about money and hate long hours. After college I resumed my tech hobby. I wrote some small programs in Python. I experimented with Haskell for a short period of time. I now am writing a webapp in Clojure. All of these things I did for me and me alone, primarily as learning exercises. This brings me to today. As I said, I feel like I would be happiest in the tech field. I feel stuck though. My ideal job is one that would be 50/50 tech and business. I enjoy programming but I have no way of knowing whether I would enjoy doing it 100% of the time. Probably I wouldn't. Further, I hate the idea of being pigeonholed into any role. I don't want to be just Programmer, or just Business Drone. I've considered project manager and product manager positions, thinking they might provide the mix of business and tech that I'm looking for. I have reservations about these roles though; as, to me, they feel like middlemen who don't actually do anything. E.g. on an informational interview, one project manager estimated to me that he spends a fifth of his time "traffic copping" his email. Hopefully there are people reading this that were in a similar position at some point. If so, I would love to hear your story and get your advice.

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posted 4 days ago on metafilter
A hundred year old book about words that people were (and often still are) using wrongly.

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posted 4 days ago on metafilter
Earworm driving me nuts for years. Vancouver, BC, mid 80's, there was a song on the radio with the lyric 'I could'a been a real contender'. Might have been local Vancouver or Canadian group.

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posted 4 days ago on metafilter
There are a ton of printed circuit board assembly companies in Asia. How do I choose one?I need to have some PCBAs done in qtys of about 1,000 at a time. So it's not prototype quantities and it's not what is generally considered to be high volume. They are fairly basic boards that don't require any particular type of expertise such as cellular or whatever. Can anyone recommend some PCBA companies in Taiwan or Mainland China that are focused on this kind of mid-volume range, provide competitive pricing, decent lead times, and are very reputable and reliable in terms of responsive and prompt communication, quality control, honesty and integrity (such as not changing parts without authorization), and taking full responsibility if they screw up? The reason I'm looking for a manufacturer there is because these boards will be used in final assembly of a product there. Thank you.

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posted 4 days ago on metafilter
I have 3 questions about it!I made a short documentary movie for a class project using Windows Movie Maker a few weeks ago. When I had finally finished editing it, somehow the file became "corrupted" and now Movie Maker will not let me open or edit it at all. Luckily I had exported an earlier version of it so I am still able to open that in Windows Media Player and for some reason, still allowed to edit it in Movie Maker. But, I can't figure out how to edit the audio. My questions are: 1) Is there any way to restore a corrupt file from Windows Movie Maker? Can I open it in iMovie or another program or are the file types not compatible? 2) For the version of the movie that I still have, how can I make the audio track visible? I can watch the movie and the audio plays with it. But I can't figure out how to a) view the audio that is already there or b) remove existing audio. 3) Is there a way to prevent a file from corrupting and/or what am I supposed to do if that happens?

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posted 4 days ago on metafilter
I heard this song twice on college radio in the early 1990's, and I haven't heard it since. It sounds like mid-tempo jazz, but with an experimental twist...At a certain point in the song, there is a section with wordless vocals chanting something like: "heyah, heyah, heyah, heyah, heyYah"... ...And then there's this bluesy kinda ragtime piano fill after that, which doesn't quite fit, but sounds really cool. What tune is this? I'm curious.

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posted 4 days ago on metafilter
I want to make a revocable trust...I am endeavoring to be financially responsible. Help me please! YANML. I want to make a revocable trust to avoid probate. The only real property I have is my residence. Here's my situation – I live in CA. I am a woman who is legally single. I have been living with my domestic partner for >30 years. He helped me raise my son. My partner is an artist but has had no income for years. He has no assets and no real property. As far as potential heirs go he has no children. He does have one brother, a niece and a couple of nephews, cousins. We share a house that I own. Only my name is on the title as PEF, single unmarried woman. My partner inherited some money of which he gave the bulk to me towards the mortgage. If I die before him I want my partner to have a place to live and ½ of the money I have. The other half of the money will go to my only child who is an adult. My partner and I would like to get married in the coming year. We think it would be easier if we were married in case of illness and so on. All the practical reasons! My partner has said that when we both die everything should go to my son. My partner has no interest in any financial issues. My son is concerned that if I marry before I make the trust and then I die before my partner there will be the risk of the house going to my partner's family. I don't think it is a probability but you never know. What's the best way to make sure my partner has a place to live? I was thinking partner and I would marry and then put the house in both of our names. Then when he dies the house would go to my son. My son and his wife suggested that I make my partner a beneficiary with the right to live in the house until his death. Would this be a good idea? Partner and I are both approaching 60. Should I make the trust as a single person? After I am married can I continue with the trust I create as a single person? Should we make a new trust as a married couple after the wedding? If we have a trust as a married couple can I change the title of the house directly to the trust from single, unmarried woman? A lawyer told me to take these steps: get married, put the house in both of our names, make the revocable trust as a couple and change the title of the house to the name of the trust. Are all those steps necessary? What's the best way to handle this? I want to take care of all this very soon. Partner and I are terrible procrastinators. One reason that we are not married after 30+ years. Advice will be greatly appreciated. Thank you so much!

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posted 4 days ago on metafilter
After my last oil delivery, my furnace won't run. I tried hitting the reset button on the furnace twice. Both times it ran for ~45 seconds before shutting off. What now?I am thinking I should try bleeding the line. Is there any danger in hitting the reset button again to bleed the line? What if it takes me multiple resets to get the line running clear? I just want to make sure I'm not overloading the furnace with oil before it fires. Any other thoughts on what the problem might be? Thanks

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