posted 3 days ago on metafilter
Some time soon, I will be staying at a hotel near the port stuff (looks SE 17th, near Eisenhower) in Ft. Lauderdale and I want to run 8-10 miles, starting by 6am.It looks like I could run north along beachy roads for a good while, but what if the forecast is cloudy? Sunrise will likely be just before 7. I should be fine just leaving my hotel, running east, then north, right? What does cloudy and just before sunrise look like down there (both visibility-wise and personal safety with respect to other people)? Most of the internet recommendations along these lines recommend Hollywood Boardwalk or talk about Miami, but those are too far (I don't want to drive somewhere to run or run to Hollywood and Uber back).

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posted 3 days ago on metafilter
My lease is almost up, and I need to buy a car. Aside from the lease, every previous car I've owned has been purchased or inherited from someone I knew. I know people negotiate at dealers, but I don't understand how it works. At all. And I'm not finding that in previous questions.I very much need a "for dummies" version of negotiating on car prices at a dealer. I have not yet decided whether I will be buying a new or used car. I will need financing in either case, but for all the cars I'm considering, I can make a 20% downpayment. My intention has always been to finance through my credit union, but looking at the dealer's website, they seem to actually have better interest rates than are listed on the credit union site. I don't understand how financing works with negotiating. As a sixty-year-old female who doesn't know anything about cars, I feel like I'm in a bad position in trying to talk to a salesperson. I am extreme conflict averse and would love to go into a coma and have someone do this for me, but that's pretty hard to arrange. (Honestly, I think car sale negotiation would be a great business for someone.) Right now I'm thinking Honda HR-V. If I'm leaving out important details, please let me know. (Also, I have reasons for not buying a car I can pay cash for, so if that's a big part of your advice, maybe skip this question.)

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posted 4 days ago on metafilter
I have a special day coming up in 3 months, and I want to do my own hair. Please give me all your pro-tips for DIY fancy hair. Bonus points for makeup advice!I have a special day coming up in 3 months, and I'd like to do my own hair. After watching a bunch of Youtube videos and trying out some of them, I believe this is not a terrible idea, so please refrain from advising me to hire a hairstylist. I want to use this as a motivator to become better at doing hair. Desired style: some kind of up-do, probably of the loose variety rather than tight & sleek. Braids and details are nice. Some examples: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9QXpaVSzeOw https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=REUdJocrFqY https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FZj_sZfZ4nI My hair: dark (East Asian), mid-back length, naturally straight but holds curls pretty well I have: a 6-year-old ceramic straightening iron, a hairdryer, one hairbrush, a few sectioning clips, a box of decent hair pins and bobbie pins (Soft'n Style), various elastics. I plan to practice several times before the day, taking notes and photos. The event is in Portland OR, outdoors in the shade for half the day (sheltered from wind) and then indoors for the evening. Questions: - What tools and accessories do you find essential for styling up-dos? Specific brands and models would be great. - Recommendations for youtube channels or books? - Other learning options for Thanks in advance!

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posted 4 days ago on metafilter
Everyone's Income Taxes Should Be Public - "Disclosure of tax payments would make it easier to hold politicians accountable. It also would help to reduce fraud and economic inequality." (via) In October 1924, the federal government threw open for public inspection the files that recorded the incomes of American taxpayers, and the amounts they had paid in taxes. Americans were gripped by a fever of interest in the finances of their neighbors. This newspaper devoted a large chunk of the front page to a list of the top taxpayers in Manhattan under a banner headline that read "J.D. Rockefeller Jr. Paid $7,435,169." One story reported that a number of wives and ex-wives had lined up at a government office in New York to seek information about their present or former husbands. Journalists soon began to note the curious absence of some conspicuously wealthy people from the lists of top taxpayers. Congress had ordered the disclosure as a weapon against tax fraud. "Secrecy is of the greatest aid to corruption," said Senator Robert Howell of Nebraska. "The price of liberty is not only eternal vigilance, but also publicity." There is every reason to think that sunlight served the desired purpose. One important piece of evidence is that wealthy Americans absolutely hated the disclosure law, and soon persuaded Congress to execute a U-turn. Your Tax Return Is None of My Business - "Should everybody (not just Trump) be required to file in public? Sure, if you want to widen inequality and nuke privacy." This idea has been suggested recently by Binyamin Appelbaum of The New York Times and also Matt Yglesias of Vox. In Norway it has been policy since 1814 and Finland does something similar. I'm afraid, though, that universal tax transparency would boost U.S. economic inequality, take away second chances and devastate privacy... Evidence from Norway indicates that in 2007, 40 percent of Norwegian adults checked somebody's tax information online, higher than the penetration of Facebook in Norway. Anonymity of the snooper was removed in 2014, and visits fell dramatically (88 percent by one measure), but still you can imagine paying others to snoop for you or the information eventually getting out over time. The result of tax-record publication was that "this game of income comparisons negatively affected the well-being of poorer Norwegians while at the same time boosting the self-esteem of the rich," according to Ricardo Perez-Truglia, a UCLA economics professor writing last week in VoxEU. There's even a smartphone app that creates income leaderboards from the data on your Facebook friends.

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posted 4 days ago on metafilter
I live in North Carolina and received my first speeding ticket today (caught in a speed trap, I realized too late three state troopers were pulling people over). What should I do?He says I was doing 51 in a 35 which I probably was, I was not paying close attentions. And I couldn't plead ignorance of the speed limit as I was just a couple miles from home. My fine is 240 which I will pay if I have to, but it seems like internet advice is to go to the court date and try and get the charge lowered? I'd rather have Mefite advice than random google advice. I am more worried about my insurance rates than the fine? I am kind of in a dither, any advice on NC speeding tickets?

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posted 4 days ago on metafilter
I'm recovering and in remission after being diagnosed with leukemia late last year. I have a bunch of medication that has not expired and I'd like to donate it if possible. One of the medications is Granix which is a very expensive injection drug that treats neutropenia. It has to be stored in a temperature controlled environment (which I've done) and I would only be able to donate to someone nearby. Is there a way to do this? I've been told the granix shots are roughly $1200-$1600/ shot and it's criminal to throw them away when so many people lack insurance or full coverage. I also have several months supply of antibiotics and antifungals. So many people helped me during my illness and I'd like to give back if at all possible.

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posted 4 days ago on metafilter
I haven't really had a boyfriend in over a decade, what is normal with texting?I've been dating someone a few months. We have a great time when we hang out, we've talked about having a relationship and you know, done the sex a bit and he's talked to my parents about dating me (he was our old neighbor). Like it seems like we're, dating dating. But sometimes he takes multiple days to respond to texts and leaves me hanging mid planning. I'll say "so where should we meet" and then I'm waiting like 24-48 hours to hear back. I'll go through the whole conversation where we break up and cry about it and then suddenly I get a text where he's like "Oh hey, yeah let's meet at the place for the thing, awesome!" ?? It's funny because I'm terrible at texting, so it's good karma for me (I'm really feeling for my poor mother right about now). I keep having the feeling though that even if the issue isn't that he wants to break up that... he's just not as into me as I am to him? Is waiting one or two days to get back to someone normal texting behavior while dating? Is it just me being insecure that I feel weird about it? After waiting after the last message for 2 days I finally said it's ok if doesn't want to get together because I'm feeling like... clearly he can't be that interested? but now I'm questioning if I should have said anything at all and should have just kept waiting? Egads?! Hope me metafilter! I might have ruined it with this guy by acting all insecure- I would like to know if I do date again, or keep dating this guy, is it normal to wait a couple days to respond to text?

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posted 4 days ago on metafilter
I am a dual US/UK citizen living in the UK. I will soon be selling my house and moving into accommodation provided by my new job for the forseeable future. Therefore I'll have a bit of money to invest but don't know how.I am seeking a financial advisor who can help me understand what to do with my capital which should be around £150k to start but I have a plan to save another £50k per year. I need to know whether it's best for investment and tax purposes to buy a rental property in the UK or the US or to put the money into a mutual fund or what. It's all very complicated because I pay tax in the UK and am also taxed as a citizen in the US and have to file every year. There are also fbar filings I have to do. Do you have any recommendations based on experience for an advisor or company who would understand my situation and be able to advise for a reasonable fee? Thank you.

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posted 4 days ago on metafilter
I can't believe I'm asking this question at my age, but it's something I have had a really hard time with. How can I get over the paralysis that comes over me when I really like someone? It's interfering with my life, and I would like to overcome this.Although I've made some headway with this issue, I'm still not living my life the way I would like to. I am finally over my last relationship and ready to date. I recently fell HARD for a friend of mine...it was like I knew there was an attraction there then suddenly overnight it was like a thunderclap and I was a lost cause. The problem is, when I am actually genuinely into someone I freeze. And I'm not sure what is causing this. I even become nervous to even tell my friends about the crush...and this is how I've been since I was little. It's like the crush has to be secret, for fear of embarassment. For example, when I was in 10th grade I had a crazy celebrity crush on a MLB baseball player. It was kind of a limerence from afar. However, I was TERRIFIED of anyone finding out. I would only post anonymously to internet baseball forums where there were a few other adoring female fans. But god forbid my parents or friends found out. I cannot explain that at all...what was I afraid of? You may peek into my question history and note that I am gay, however when I was little I had some crushes on the opposite sex that still gave me this fear (like the baseball player). So I don't think it's quite about my sexuality as it is about LIKING someone that is....shameful? Embarassing? Scary? I can't quite put my finger on it. It's not like this all the time, mind you. I have lesser crushes and I feel much more at ease mentioning these to friends, although I still have a tough time acting on them. I'm trying to pinpoint the fear - whether it is fear of embarassment, fear of rejection, fear of the bubble bursting. Fear that the other person or someone I know finds out I like this person so deeply...it's nerve wracking to me. And it shouldn't be. The thing is, the more "suitable" the crush the worse I feel. This latest crush is a perfect match it seems. And I feel utterly powerless to do anything about it. I am longing to text her just to say hi, to try to set up plans to hang out, but I can't do it. The thought of it makes me almost nauseous. But what, exactly, am I afraid of? Of her not responding? Of her responding in a weird way? I think part of it is that I'm afraid she will KNOW. From some innocent text she will KNOW THAT I LIKE HER and will be...repulsed? Offended? Annoyed? Maybe that is the heart of it. And this is someone who could very well be interested in me...it's way too soon to tell either way how she might feel. As an aside, I CAN text my crush and invite her to do things with me, but only if I deem that it appears friendly and won't come across as me hitting on her. Aka, business only. I'm baffled as I watch my friends start texting away with people they find themselves interested in. How do they start those conversations? How are they so brave? I've worked on this here and there with my therapist. She would tell me to pick up my phone and just text my latest crush just to say hi. "Just text her to see what she's up to," my therapist would say. And I would stare back at her in shock. What? Are you kidding? No way. That is tooooo scary. She'll think it's weird. She'll be turned off. Logically I know if I got a text from someone like that I'd find it curious but pleasant, and I might wonder if they had a thing for me. But I cannot seem to put this logic into place when I'm the one doing the texting. I just...can't get to the bottom of this. Maybe my therapist wasn't going about this in the right way. This fear seems so deeply rooted into the wiring of my brain that even no amount of alcohol can touch it. It's also strange because I've done a lot of work attempting to break through this phobia/fear/paralysis and I feel like I just can't put a dent in it. It's almost like I'm dealing with a weird kind of rejection sensitivity, although I have never been diagnosed with ADHD. I do however deal with my fair share of generalized anxiety disorder. The reason I'm asking this question is because I feel this is seriously interfering with my life. I don't necessarily need the crush to reciprocate....I just need to feel like I gave myself a chance. I end up hiding my emotions away from these people and waiting around for someone to come to me. Which has clearly not been working too well. I end up feeling like a complete failure, my self esteem goes down the toilet, I feel like I'm missing out on things, and I end up sobbing in the shower at the end of the night when I have acted like a purely-platonic-only-friend-no-romance-to-see-here! around someone I really like. Avoiding showing people I'm interested in that I'm interested in them is just not working at all, and I'm convinced this has been a huge reason why I'm literally always the friend, never the girlfriend. And it doesn't necessarily have to be a crush....this happens with most people I am interested in dating. I've tried to get around this by asking people out early on...before I've let emotions cloud my mind, but sometimes circumstances prevent me from doing that. Also, despite the fact that I have trained myself to ask people out as much as possible, I've been rejected a lot and I don't have enough successes to where rejection has gotten any easier. It's almost gotten harder because I feel defeated before I even start. I guess the bottom line is, has anyone felt this way? Has anyone overcome it? I'm an otherwise well adjusted, very social individual with many friends, and this issue only seems to crop up when I'm into someone romantically. If they make a move on me it's MUCH easier, however as a lesbian I need to be making moves a lot of times to get anything going. The funny thing is, I have no qualms about asking people on dates via online dating - I usually plan the entire first date if I'm online dating. But this is only because I have no clue if I actually LIKE the person yet. They don't mean much to me until I meet them...they're just pixels on a screen. But online dating is like an alternate reality to me and it doesn't translate to asking people out or flirting with people I meet in day to day circumstances. Can any of you armchair psychologists make any sense of this? I am going to bring this up to my new therapist but she won't be able to see me for a week or two. And perhaps the hive mind can give me some food for thought in the meantime.

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posted 4 days ago on metafilter
In tonight's election, the province of Alberta—home to 4.3 million and 1 in 9 Canadians—rejected Premier Rachel Notley's New Democratic Party (NDP) in favor of Jason Kenney's United Conservative Party (UCP). Elected in more than 60 of 87 electoral districts (the NDP had 52), the UCP will form a majority government. Kenney's platform includes a re-emphasis on Alberta's oil industry, a 4% reduction in the corporate tax rate, a repeal of the carbon tax and the farm safety act, a reduction in the under-18 minimum wage, and a balanced budget by 2022. View the CBC's summary of party platforms via Twitter; and links to the NDP platform and the UCP platform. Alberta has a long history of conservative governments, but the NDP broke that 44-year streak in the 2015 election (previously). Incoming premier Jason Kenney is a controversial figure; last week allegations surfaced that fraudulent emails were used to cast ballots for Kenney's party leadership. This is being investigated by the RCMP, which recently executed a search warrant at the office of a Calgary UCP candidate. Kenney has refused to dismiss candidates who have made homophobic remarks, such as Mark Smith (who has won his riding with 66% of the vote). The NDP presents: 5 people who think Jason Kenney is too extreme. Notley (wiki) is the first premier of Alberta to not win a second election. She turns 55 on April 17. Notley has emphasized diversifying Alberta's economy away from oil and gas. ("What did Notley do for Alberta, anyway?" [Facebook]) Kenney (wiki), age 50, was a long-time cabinet minister under prime minister Stephen Harper. In 2017 he won the leadership of the UCP, a newly formed party that appears to have solved the 2015 "conservative vote split". During Kenney's post-election speech, the crowd chanted "Build that pipe!". Kenney asked for a correction: "Folks, ... it's build those pipes!". He also mentioned "foreign-funded special interests" numerous times: "your days of pushing Albertans around with impunity just ended." Kenney's plea for an improvement in political discourse was met with comparatively weak applause.

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posted 4 days ago on metafilter
What's bigger than an American football field and flies? The Stratolaunch. April 13 saw its first flight, a two and half hour shakedown over the Mojave. Previously.

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posted 4 days ago on metafilter
Long day at the studio, pouring a drink, and we should probably talk about this thing sitting at the bottom of Lake Ontario Thats marked on my navigational chart no one really wants to talk about....who's in for a discussion about an extra terrestrial impact? (single-link Twitter thread)

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posted 4 days ago on metafilter
AI hearing aid translates 27 languages in real-time and also doubles as a hands-free earpiece. The language translation works in conjunction with a smartphone app. If an English speaker wearing the device says something to a Chinese speaker, the Livio AI system would translate the words and display them in Chinese characters on the English speaker's smartphone screen. If the Chinese speaker said something in return, those words would be directly translated into spoken English in the ears of the hearing aid wearer. The ideal customer might be someone who is reasonably tech-savvy and comfortable with using smartphone apps, and perhaps has a relatively active lifestyle. At the end of the day, some people may not need the "fully loaded Lamborghini" of hearing aids and may simply want the basics, Sawalich says. But for people who are already seriously contemplating spending thousands of dollars on ordinary hearing aids, the capabilities of the Livio AI hearing aid could prove enticing. After all, why reach for the smartphone in the pocket or strap on smart watches and fitness trackers when your hearing aid is already along for the ride?

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posted 4 days ago on metafilter
I have a lot of tabs open in Firefox. One of them is playing a Youtube video. I can't find it. Is there an easy way to locate the tab? - Note: I can't (probably) do the thing where you look for the tab with the speaker icon. I'd rather go to history and look for the tab with the audio on. For some reason, I can't figure this out ... Thank you!

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posted 4 days ago on metafilter
Can anyone think of movies with awesome dance scenes in them, made in the last twenty years?I feel like all the dance scenes I know are pre-millennial, mainly from older musicals. I'm not super knowledgeable about up-to-date movie musicals, but in particular I'd like to have a catalogue of examples of recent dance scenes in movies, from musicals or non-musicals. This Askme thread from a couple years ago had a lot of great examples but most of them are at least a couple decades old. So give me your 21st-century epic dance moments! Thanks for any suggestions!

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posted 4 days ago on metafilter
Help me understand the cultural and symbolic significance of the Notre Dame.I, too, stopped in my tracks when I saw yesterday's news about the Notre Dame. It's obviously a significant cultural, architectural, and historical loss. But I've honestly been surprised by the outpouring of grief that I've seen over the incident, here on MetaFilter and elsewhere. I'm not trying to invalidate anyone's feelings. I just didn't know that people felt this strongly about this particular building, and I'm curious to understand why they do. I understand that it's an architecturally and historically notable building, one of the most recognizable landmarks in the world, and a national symbol to the French. (Which is why I agree that it's obviously a significant loss.) But it's hard to imagine quite the same reaction over, say, the Leaning Tower of Pisa, or even Westminster Abbey. It seems like Notre Dame has some unique significance. What is that significance? What does the Notre Dame symbolize that causes the fire to resonate so strongly with so many people? I honestly don't know – I'm asking so that I can be better informed. I could, of course, be mistaken about any or all of this. Thanks.

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posted 4 days ago on metafilter
What cocktails should I serve with these entrees?I do a lot of cooking, and a few friends have asked to organize an informal series of feasts this summer, during which I will prepare a simple "weeknight" type meal while teaching them how I'm doing it. Because I'm an idiot I'd like to complicate matters by having a signature cocktail for each meal, one that we can all enjoy both during the cooking process and while we're eating the result. Below, I've copied the preliminary list of their requested dishes. What should we drink to go with them? Assume a reasonably well-stocked bar and a reasonable willingness to splurge, but if it requires like a $50 bottle of creme de violet that I'll never use again maybe I'll pass on that one. Stuffed shells Baked macaroni and cheese Quiche (probably spinach and onion) Basic "pasta with vegetable and white wine + lemon sauce" Split roast chicken and vegetables + gravy Chicken and dumplings Homemade calzones Paprikash Foil-baked fish (cobia in this case) Shepherd's pie Risotta (with roasted brussels sprouts) Meatballs (still haven't settled on "subs" or "with spaghetti") Shrimp creole/pilau Penne a la vodka (the Barefoot Contessa version that you bake; Google it it rules)

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posted 4 days ago on metafilter
A friend, who is not technically oriented, has a stray unencrypted wifi signal in her house. It does not allow access to the internet. It is in addition to the normal 2ghz and 5ghz wifi signals from her router.The signal is full strength, and diminishes if I stand outside the house and walk away and therefore we don't think it's from a neighboring house. Could this be a derelict range extender perhaps left over from a previous router or service, which is now verizon? I have no experience with range extenders and don't know if an abandoned one would continue to create a signal. Any other ideas? I'm now 150 miles away so can't investigate directly for now.

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posted 4 days ago on metafilter
Hope me! My google-fu is failing me. Maybe some Me-fu mojo can prop me back up. I am looking for a short video interview of DJT from the 80s or 90s, possibly on the floor of a political convention after it had ended. I believe there was a fair amount of background noise. The interview may have been conducted by Mike Wallace, or maybe even Chris, and I think it was impromptu.

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posted 4 days ago on metafilter
Twelve years ago, after a mid-game rain delay, a couple of front-row fans grabbed a pop foul, ruining an easy out for fielder Garret Anderson. Unremarkable play, not worth remarking on. But then, 1.62 seconds later, here comes the pizza.

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posted 4 days ago on metafilter
My parents live in a wooded area in Bristol County, MA and have lots of bird feeders, so the backyard is always full of wildlife! I can't quite figure out what this bird is, though. Its call (link) is simply a series of high-pitched buzzes on one note. What could it be?

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posted 4 days ago on metafilter
Retrotransposons tell us a lot of interesting things about evolution. Are there any great documentaries about them? Ideally it would talk about pufferfish genomes (hardly any retrotransposon content), the phylogeny of mammals and plants (lots of retrotransposon content in genomes that can help us trace family trees), the phylogeny of retrotransposons themselves (how are the different retrotransposons related to each other?) and the junk DNA vs. biologically active vs. evolutionarily active debate about retrotransposon content in genomes. Ideally, it would be aimed at a lay audience - Attenborough sort of stuff.

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posted 4 days ago on metafilter
A couple bad experiences make me feel really negativeIn my 20s I studied communications and worked in the arts and worked in the non profit world a bit. Mainly as coordinator, travel planning, and doing some communications. It was always my goal to become full time communications person in a non profit organization or arts organization . I haven't managed to get hired for those positions yet and have had to bounce around as an executive assistant and copy editor. My main talent is language skills for reading, writing, editing but over the course of the year I realized I am exceptional at the skill of "empathy" as well (though until now I've avoided public-facing roles because I am quite introverted). Then as I got older (ok, I was 29, it was last year) I was trying to be responsible and plan for the future so I decided to make the switch to IT. I got a support job in a company that had a great reputation for supporting professional growth across all levels of employees even the bottom rung. I've been doing that for the past year and it's become clear that as the company has grown massively in the past year their culture of fostering professional development has disappeared and so now I find myself in a dead end job that also made me so burned out that I had to take 2 months of sick leave (and also found out recently that several coworkers are on sick leave as well). I did learn a lot over the course of the year, mainly improved my interpersonal communication skills by a heck of a lot, but it came at a big cost to my wellbeing. I feel really demoralized and stupid about this and I'm having trouble moving on with my life. I always in the past worked in organizations that , even if they don't pay as well, at least I believe in what they're doing in the world. To be clear the company is not evil in any way, I just find their mission mundane. I find myself working for a corporation where I don't feel personally connected or invested in its mission in the world. Initially I felt that going against my personal values was okay because it was going to lead me to a stable career where I could build some kind of family life and I felt that the bigger picture was worth that sacrifice. But now that I've realized the promises made when I was hired will now all be broken, I feel such a sense of regret for navigating out of a trajectory that, even if it was nothing prestigious on paper, at least gave me a sense of personal satisfaction that I was among like-minded people and working for something I believe in, however marginal my roles may have been. I know all of this probably sounds like a lot of drama for nothing but I guess I am a very emotional person. ( I also might be having mental health problems right now, some kind of burn out) I need to feel like what I am doing in the world is helping a cause that I believe in, be it an art organization that produces meaningful work or a non profit organization that helps marginalized people. I need to feel that I am serving a deeper purpose in my work even if I'm just an assistant or something. That probably sounds silly or whatnot and I should have probably gone into a "helping profession" if I really feel driven to help people but it's too late for that now. I've thought about talking to a spiritual leader about this because I feel they will understand at least. I wasn't raised in any religious tradition sadly, but I have considered attending United church sometimes. So I guess what I need help with is: 1) moving on from this feeling of being totally demoralized and disappointed in myself and the company I work for 2) Getting back into the non profit world where I feel most at home. 3) Accepting the fact that I am not designed to work in for-profit companies. 4) Actually moving on from this and becoming confident in my skills again and energetic enough to apply to new positions let alone start one. 5) Any other ideas that come to mind.

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posted 4 days ago on metafilter
I was named as the father. I did the DNA test. It's mine. Now I'll be paying all associated support the court names. However I've been basically keeping this to myself. The question is, how long does that last? If you're named as a father on a birth certificate, how long till that shows up in Ancestry.com (where my sister and I share an account)? Or, for that matter, other publicly searchable databases? I just want to know how much time I have til I have to tell my own family.

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posted 4 days ago on metafilter
I want to submit some chapters of a book I'm writing to KDP or the e-book version on Amazon. I have both short stories and a book I'm working on. Does Amazon KDP accept short stories and poems? And for a book, can I submit my first 10 chapters and see if readers enjoy it, then add to my book in the months ahead? Or does the book have to be completely done? Thanks!

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