posted about 22 hours ago on metafilter
My beloved car stereo is becoming obsolete, help me find a replacement!In my car (2009 Scion xD) I have an Oxygen Audio O Car stereo, which is absolutely wonderful - it keeps my iPhone at eye level so I can use Waze easily, allows Spotify to play directly into the car speakers, and keeps my phone charged. Unfortunately, it is designed to only hold phones up to the 4s - and since the company seems to have dropped off the face of the earth, it's doubtful they will offer an upgrade. So, I'm looking to find a car stereo that allows you to plug an iPhone into a dock that is in the stereo face. Do any exist? (Note: using a separate phone mount will not work in my situation. The way my dashboard is set up, the phone mount would have to be relatively high up, and the outlets for aux and charging are at the very bottom of the dash console and would require long cables, which I am trying to avoid.)

Read More...
posted about 22 hours ago on metafilter
She's six, and is kind of timid. The other kids like her, but she daydreams when the coach is talking, and is noticeably less athletic than her teammates. I was always terrible at team sports, but feel like I missed out on some personal development by not playing. Should I keep her in soccer, or are there better things she could be doing?

Read More...
posted about 23 hours ago on metafilter
I've always known that I want to find someone and fall in love and raise a family, the whole bit. That's my end-goal, no other ambition in my life is more important to me.. But I always freak out in relationships. I'm almost always the one moving things forwards, because I know what I want, but I get so anxious sometimes.. I'm currently dating someone who is actually perfect for me. He's like me in every way, I've never had better. I don't want to lose him, and I'm not planning on it, but I'm hoping to get advice as to how to stop "freaking out".A little about my dating history, for clarification. Before and in between my "big" relationships, I dated many people, always with the intention of staying together but always wound up just feeling wrong about it and ending them, always within three months. I hurt a lot of people that way. My first "big" relationship ended up lasting three years, and we were engaged. I spent the first several months freaking out constantly, but I was open about my issues and he was understanding and allowed me to fetal in bed for days at a time, and was always still there. After six months of flat refusing to leave him, regardless of how badly I wanted to run, it got much better. The final year turned back into the first six months and I was so depressed that I broke it off. It was painful. The other two "big" relationships lasted nine months each and both ended because they were emotionally abusive. I flat ignored any "freak outs" for these two as well, at least until there was a basis to leave anyway. The main thoughts that gets me down is "What am I missing out on?" "I can do better." and "What if I screw up, which I totally will?" and the only thought that makes me feel better is "What's the worst that could happen if I stay? I lose a couple more months of being free and people get hurt. It happens, people heal, no biggie, right?" It helps a little anyway.. Thoughts like how great the person is and how much I love them don't help. I logically know these things, but the "freaking out" isn't logical. I also tend to have crushes as normal, even when serious about someone. They're just as powerful and meaningless as if I were single, and this does not help! How do you cope? I can't even imagine what made me this way... Probably Disney. >__>

Read More...
posted about 23 hours ago on metafilter
I'm self-aware enough to know I am a perfectionist with Impostor Syndrome, but I'm clueless as to how to fix this. I need to kick this before I crash and burn at my new, fabulous job.I recently began a prestigious job. I'm partially (mostly?) convinced that I'm going to fail at it, that I'm not intelligent enough to do the work properly, that I'm going to disappoint my boss, that everyone will find out I'm neither smart nor capable nor blah blah blah. I am also aware this line of thinking is a self-fulfilling prophecy. For example: my job involves a lot of reading, and I am retaining very little of what I read. When reading, I'm thinking I NEED TO RETAIN THIS and asking myself questions I think I might later be asked, but I find myself going down rabbit holes before I've grasped the big picture and, at some point, realize I am not absorbing anything. My boss asked me a question today about something that I read (albeit only once) and my mind went blank, I had to grab my notes before I answered, my answer wasn't good, I felt myself flush. Ugh. Compounding my anxiety is the knowledge that my predecessor was The Smartest and Most Amazing Employee Ever, as multiple people in my office have told me. So, on top of the (unreasonable?) pressure I am placing on myself to perform, I have the added pressure of performing up to my predecessor's level. Reading over these paragraphs I am rolling my eyes at myself. Why can't I make myself believe I can do this? I've tried to do affirmations and the like, reminding myself that I am intellectually capable - but there's a voice I can't quiet that is laughing at me and telling me nope, you're dumb and bad at this, sorry, you just are. This is killing what should be my enthusiasm for a dream job. Please, help. Here are my questions: (1) How do I kick this Impostor Syndrome, once and for all? (2) How do I curb my perfectionistic tendencies while still doing a good job? (3) How can I banish this mind-blanking, paralyzing anxiety that washes over me when I am asked a simple question? (4) And, as a bonus: how can I regain/improve my ability to retain what I read? I don't have the best memory in the world. (Or do I?!) One last thing: therapy. Therapy isn't exactly smiled upon in my field, which I know is harmful and crummy, because I am a believer in therapy and I've been (for other reasons), and I've had to explain, in a professional context and in great detail, why and for what and for how long. I'd appreciate other-than-therapy suggestions and resources (things to read! ha!).

Read More...
posted about 23 hours ago on metafilter
Do you know of any sites or blogs or discussion boards about current and past New Yorker poems?Long-long time New Yorker reader here. Love the short stories, the cartoons, the articles etc. I'm even okay with the recent redesign. (Why isn't 'Shouts and Murmurs' funnier?) However, the poems are sometimes incomprehensible to me. I would like to parse them, appreciate them even but I would really like to understand them too.

Read More...
posted about 23 hours ago on metafilter
Our cities are full of majestic monuments, stunning sculptures and artistic statues, each having a story to tell. Thousands of them have been made but only a few of them are really extraordinary and picture-worthy. That's why our readers set out to find the world's most creative statues and sculptures, which add color and emotion to the most boring areas of the cities. Brought to you by Bored Panda 25 Of The Most Creative Sculptures And Statues From Around The World

Read More...
posted about 23 hours ago on metafilter
Lil Dicky - Lemme Freak

Read More...
posted about 23 hours ago on metafilter
How do I turn ten text files into an AutoRun file?I need to provide a set of ~10 small text files to other departments (off-site) in my company. These 'text files' have non- TXT extensions; they actually are small programs that run a proprietary instrument, but really they are just 20-50 lines of text each. So these files need to be copied faithfully and to exactly the right location. Right now, I am often personally traveling to the site and copy/pasting the files to the right place on the hard drive because that is honestly the simplest way to do it. There's got to be an easier way. Can't I rig up a CD or flashdrive that will have an Autorun file, which will automatically copy past these files where they need to go? It would be awesomer if the Autorun makes some sort of log that can be returned to me, so I can record that things were done properly. Difficulty: I am a biochemist by training with only a dabbling of any programming experience, and it would be in BASIC and FORTRAN. I also am old enough to be familiar with basic DOS commands. I am good at following directions, but I have no idea where to find these directions....

Read More...
posted about 24 hours ago on metafilter
While most things are going very well, my pregnant wife's back has really been hurting and her main relief has been an electric heating pad. However the heating pad is only 12in x 24in. I am hunting for a bigger heating pad if possible. Any help appreciated.

Read More...
posted about 24 hours ago on metafilter
A movie star names things. The Toast tells us what movie stars really think as they film the films.

Read More...
posted about 24 hours ago on metafilter
We're having eight Fuji Instax cameras at our upcoming wedding and I'm trying to estimate how much film we'll need.Six of them will be at the tables, one will used as a diy photo booth camera and one will be by the guest book. We're hoping that everybody will add some of the photos to the guest book. There will be about 65 people attending and it's a mid morning ceremony followed by lunch. We will also have two professional photographers so we're not relying on the instax photos as our sole wedding photos. Also, if you've used the Instax cameras before, do you have any advice? Are they easy to use? Will we need to write instructions on how to change the film?

Read More...
posted 1 day ago on metafilter
I was working on a group project to build a simple website for a local business. Like a crazy person I assumed that once we finished the project it wouldn't take that much work to move the files to a hosting site and link from GoDaddy.Now I'm regretting putting myself in charge of this. I have all the files, but I'm having difficulty getting the files into a position where I can see them and they look like their respective html and css. Currently, I'm working with it within Dropbox and I can forward the domain to the main html download page, but not the viewable page. Once I get the site forwarding I was going to work on altering the file to pick up the new links to the pictures and style files. Right now I'm just trying to get the main link to the index html. I'm not married to the Dropbox idea, I've tried Google Sites also, without any more luck. Obviously, I really don't know what I'm doing here and no this is no longer a class project. Please rest assured that this website is very unlikely to need more space or bandwidth than provided by any of the above solutions.

Read More...
posted 1 day ago on metafilter
My doctor is wanting me to have an abdominal ultrasound to rule out gallstones. This test requires fasting. I cannot go for long periods of time without eating because my sugar drops. Need advice.The sugar attacks often send me into a panic attack, especially if I do not feel safe and cannot get to food immediately. The thought of having to fast for this test is causing me extreme distress and anxiety. I do not want to go through the physical and psychological symptoms of a low blood sugar attack. My doctor is trying to get my anxiety level down so I can deal with the test. She has tried to reassure me that I will not die and that I will be ok. I am not at all convinced. How can I get through this test? I eat breakfast as soon as I get up, and the last time I went without breakfast I nearly passed out. Can I have a glucose tablet before the test? A glucose gel? What kind of help on this can I expect from the imaging center? I am terrified of going through this horrible experience and also of what I might have to go through if the test shows stones. I am terrified of getting sick to my stomach due to the low sugar (I have emetophobia). I am also afraid of and dreading feeling horrible from not eating. I can't see myself getting through this test.

Read More...
posted 1 day ago on metafilter
Search for word usage in movies and television over time.Movies and television shows often reflect cultural trends of the time they are made in. Even movies that take place during the past or future can say something about the present through metadata or production style. Using the Bookworm platform, Benjamin Schmidt, an assistant professor of history at Northeastern University, provides a tool that lets you see trends in movie and television dialogue.

Read More...
posted 1 day ago on metafilter
Hyperreal numbers: infinities and infinitesimals - "In 1976, Jerome Keisler, a student of the famous logician Tarski, published this elementary textbook that teaches calculus using hyperreal numbers. Now it's free, with a Creative Commons copyright!" (pdf—25mb :) also btw :P The logic of real and complex numbers - "The cool part is that in some ways the complex numbers are simpler than the real numbers! The ultimate reason is that you can't talk about one complex number being greater than another. This avoids some nonstandard number systems where you have a number that's greater than all the ones you wanted to talk about." Science, models, and machine learning - "Machine learning is the art of getting computers to learn, so you don't have to explicitly tell them what to do. People use it in spam filters, search engines that guess what you're trying to find, optical character recognition, cars that drive themselves, and many other things. But how does it work?" Neural Networks and Deep Learning - "Inspired by the topics discussed in this earlier post, I've been reading Michael Nielsen's online book on neural nets and deep learning." Introduction to Statistical Computing - "At an intersection of Enigmas of Chance and Corrupting the Young." Higher Algebra & Topos Theory - "Mathematician Jacob Lurie, who was honored for redefining models in algebraic geometry, negotiated with his publisher to make his book on math principles available for free download on his personal website. While academics sometimes place papers online free, putting a whole book online isn't yet standard practice, according to the 36-year-old Harvard University professor. 'From my point of view, the benefit of writing a book is for people to look at it. I would like as many people as possible to look at it', he said."

Read More...
posted 1 day ago on metafilter
I've moved to a new place and need to meet some friends. I'm thinking of hosting some casual brunch/dinner parties to help fix this. Problem: I suck at dinner parties. How can I fix this?I've given dinner parties in the past, but they've always stressed me out a lot, and they never had the fun casual vibe that other dinner parties I've been to have. I'd love to become the master of the casual, fun, warm, stress-free dinner (or brunch) party. Note -- I have some okay cooking skills, a big table, and not a ton of money (so I can't just impress by buying lobster, etc.) What are your tips? What have you loved about these things you've been to? Food? Drinks? Prep tips? Music? Pep talks? Anything!

Read More...
posted 1 day ago on metafilter
The new eyeglasses saga somewhat continues. Thought the third time would be the charm... seems like that doesn't ring true for this situation.This is actually my third question bordering on the saga of getting my new eyeglasses. Questions one and two had a lot of helpful answers (and I incorporated some suggestions, such as asking the optician about certain scenarios). To sum it up for those not wanting to go through the entire saga, reader's digest version: got new eyeglasses and frames - am myopic and has a certain amount of astigamation. First pair of glasses had too strong a RX, slanted perception (very slanted, to the point where it was hard walking in a straight line). Second pair, on my left eye, had too weak a RX, but the right was just fine. Now, third pair. Ahhhh. It's much better, and an improvement. I'll give it that much. However, several things still are bothering me. a) The shell I have (it's a glossy finish, as I recently discovered) has different color hues that's not immediately seen in daylight/light, but when I am using my computer in a dark room (with the computer screen the only source of light), or watching TV in a dark room, the light 'enters' the frame (which is semi-rimless) and reflects the light, causing a major distraction. This gets on my nerves, big time. Any ideas or solutions to make this work? I asked the optician if she recommended nail-polishing the frame, but she said that wasn't recommended, and she mentioned that the 'glossy-ness' of the frame would eventually wear off. This isn't workable, though. Any ideas how to fix it, or at least work around it somehow so it's not as jarring? (the frame is a Modo dtort, 3032, titanium, if that helps.) 2) Both RX's in both eyes are great! I can see in a longer distance now. Yay. That part's all good. The problem? I'm still experiencing slant-ness, although to a lesser extent. I've discovered when I put my glasses up further on my nose, the slant-ey effect reduces somehow. It may just be a simple case of adjusting the frame, but it's still a bit annoying. Rooms in my house do not appear to be slanted, but outside does. 3) Sometimes when looking at text on my computer/iPhone, text appears a bit 'furry'/out of focus. The odd thing is, this is sporadic. Sometimes, text is crystal clear. Sometimes, it's a bit out of focus. This happens regardless of where the frame is perched - adjusting the frame doesn't make a difference. I know it's not my eyes, because I tested with my old glasses, and text is consistently crystal clear. Additionally, when I look around the room/quickly turn my head, it takes a second or so for my eyes to "focus" - it's kind of like using a camera and moving the camera around, if that makes sense. This did not happen with my old glasses, for what I can remember. I'm not sure if all this is part of the normal adjusting process, or if the eyeglasses are STILL not the ideal fit for me. It's been ~36 hours (got the glasses on Monday, but subtracting sleep, etc). This has been frustrating for me - I've already used up three questions on this! And I don't want to have to 'bother' the optometrist again. Yes, I know rebuilding eyeglasses is built in the cost, it's my right as a customer, etc., but it's also annoying on my end - having to wait a week or so, adjusting the glasses again, etc. I just want this solved. The basic question I'm asking is - is what I described normal when adjusting to new lenses/frames? Is it a symptom of something potentially still off with my lens? I definitely don't remember waiting this long to fully adjust to my new lens when I got them two and an half years ago. Many thanks! And, yes, I know YANMD. If I forgot to mention something, I'll add it in the comments.

Read More...
posted 1 day ago on metafilter
Bad video game merchandise found on a Chinese website

Read More...
posted 1 day ago on metafilter
The Smart car folks have come up with an idea to make crosswalks a little safer (SLYT, Smart Blue), the Dancing Traffic Light.

Read More...
posted 1 day ago on metafilter
My laptop died. Boo. I got a new iPad Air. Yay, I guess. How should I set up my privacy, security, and general user preferences?I've had two generations of the iPhone so I'm familiar with iOS, but like all my computers they've devolved into a pile of unusued/forgotten apps and their associated preferences. I'd like to get this iPad off to a good start so I have a few questions: I've noticed some differences, like the absence of certain apps like flickr. What else should I be aware of?,li>What security and privacy settings are most important?I've activated Find My iPad. Which iClloud preferences should I be concerned about?I decided to the Chrome browsers on my phone and the iPad, something I didn't do with my laptop. Is there a reason I shouldn't do this?My Apple wireless keyboard works great. The mouse won't sync, but I'll take that to the genius bar. Since this may end up being my primary computer for a while, is there anything else I should use? iBonus embarrassing question: If I install Candy Crush on the iPad is there any chance I will lose my place in the game or in the game on my phone? I'm on level 344 and would be so bummed if I lost all that progress. :p Thanks MeFites! (I realize there may not be agreement across the board. That's fine, I'll take everything under advisement.)

Read More...
posted 1 day ago on metafilter
What are some strategies to keep my energy up, my motivation and my sanity when I start working two separate jobs next week?For the past five months I've been mostly unemployed except for some relatively simple projects here and there. Loosely defined, I'm a digital developer, primarily for the web, both front and back end. This means virtually all my work consists of coding, designing and meetings with either clients, contractors or coworkers. I sit in front of a computer constantly. One of the jobs is full-time, on-site, 8-5 for a high-profile organization. Luckily, there should be little off-hours work, freeing me up for other things. I will work the other job from my home office at my own schedule. I can spend as much time as I'm willing and able to devote to it, but will need to work, minimally, twenty-five hours a week. Some details: - Job #1 requires a commute of 30-45 minutes each way. - I am middle-aged, and my endurance for long coding sessions ain't what it used to be. I start to get sloppy when I get tired. - I have a wife and kids that need and deserve love and attention. - I have all the standard middle-class responsibilities. Home maintenance, chores, etc. - I don't do well with less than 8 hours of sleep. - I could be in better shape, physically. - I find high protein snacks and meals seem to keep me from having extremes of high and low energy levels. So, any suggestions? This will be a fast ramp-up, and the last thing I want to do is burn out.

Read More...
posted 1 day ago on metafilter
I just set up a Chromecast. Casting from the Chrome browser on my Windows PC works fine, as does Youtube on my Android phone (Droid Maxx running 4.4.4). No other apps (tried Netflix, Google Play Music & Movies, and HBOGo) work (won't even show the cast icon). I also tried Netflix with an iPad (running iOS 7, but not the latest version) and it didn't allow me to cast either. But I am able to successfully see the Chromecast device from both my phone and iPad using the Chromecast app. What might be the problem?

Read More...
posted 1 day ago on metafilter
Chip and Dale cartoon compilation (slyt)

Read More...
posted 1 day ago on metafilter
My dad will be making his last child support payment to my mother next month for my brother who is 19 and no longer in full time education (he's going to university). After then he will no longer financially support my brother - he hasn't financially supported me since I was 18 when he made his last support payment. I am now thinking of asking him directly to make a monthly payment to me and my brother since he isn't supporting us in any other way.I live at home with my mother who I do pay rent to (I have a minimum wage full time job) but she nevertheless still houses and provides for me which my dad doesn't in any way. Earlier this year my mum helped my brother send a legal letter to my dad requesting financial support during his time at university, my dad responded with an emotional cutting letter that put my brother off pursuing it further - in it he said he can't because he needs to pay a tax bill and basically telling him to get a job and support himself like everyone else. Recently he slightly changed his tune and told my brother that he might be able to financially help him in the future – if things get better (from past experience this is an empty promise). Do you think I am justified to ask for this? If so, what would be the best way to do this when the person is full of excuses and self-justification? Let me give you an overview of the relationship: My parents divorced over 14 years ago, my dad has since remarried and had two children (one with special needs). He's a workaholic (loves his job) and spends hardly any time with his second family and it feels like he places me and my brother very low on his priority list. Since the divorce, he was made to pay child support to my mother by the government child support agency instead of just paying her directly. He has always resented this as he sees it as giving child support to my mum (even though it went to us) even though she pretty much raised us entirely herself (other than an ex-partner) who is no longer on the scene any more. We used to see him every other weekend and he would take us out places and/or have us to stay. These visits gradually grew less and less leading to a period of no contact with him (around six months) when his income was reassessed and he was told that he had to pay no support at all - he deliberately went self-employed so as to reduce how much his income was looked at. He then chose not to make any voluntary payments to my mum or directly to us (he did have to start paying again eventually). He also stopped sending us birthday or Christmas presents for a few years even after we reinitiated contact – I didn't get anything for my 18th or 21st birthday (this really hurt). Don't really see him much anymore, other than for lifts to the airport (me and my brother don't drive) and university. Which while appreciated is the absolute bare minimum that a father should do to help their children. He also promised my brother financial help with driving lessons but never did. His personality is as follows. He's financially irresponsible, doesn't have any savings, has lots of debts and things like tax bills because he doesn't pay his taxes properly. He then always complains about how he never has any money, his parents (my grandparents) are well-off so they bail him out if they get in trouble so he's never learned to be financially responsible. He's selfish and emotionally distant, it never really feels like he's listening or cares when I have a conversation with him on the phone. He hates responsibility and resents my mother because she represents responsibility. He always makes excuses - he's an excuse machine especially if it is anything to do with money. Both me and my brother find him intimidating to confront (we tend to clam up around him), he has an explosive temper which is really frightening although he doesn't get angry often. He has never got help with this anger. This is why it's been hard to ask him for money directly before. Any time we've even brought it up, he has a massive line up of excuses and self-justifications prepared so you can't even get through to him. He's not a bad person and I know that I'm focussing on his negative qualities but I've been wanting to get this off my chest for a long time and I'm afraid to tell him how I feel.

Read More...
posted 1 day ago on metafilter
Me and my ex are still friends, we still talk and we're friendly with each other but he never gave me a reason not to be anyway. We just started talking again a few weeks ago after being broken up for 2 years.I pretty much stopped hanging around a lot of the same people he hung around so we wouldn't see each other and my feelings wouldn't come rushing back. But since we started talking he's told me i should come to game night's on Tuesdays and i did last night but i kind of got a surprise i didn't want to see. We were playing a game and my ex joined us after awhile and the only chair that was open was the one next to me. About an hour later some random girl i've never met came in and walks up behind him and puts her arms around him and hugs and him and kisses him all right in front of me and starts going on and on about how unbearable this is. This is just kind of new to me, should i just do my best to ignore them when they're together and all over each other? I don't want to just stop going because i enjoy everyone else's company. And maybe it's just me and my way of thinking but i never got into the whole pda thing besides holding hands or if no one was around hugging and kissing sure. I was always shy and awkward with that sort of thing anyway though.

Read More...