posted 1 day ago on metafilter
Introducing WorkHarder, a "non-funding online platform for creative projects." From Daily Show producer Jena Friedman, there's now a wonderful solution for all the artists out there who can't find enough friends to give them easy cash. The sketch was written for Wedensday nights' Doctors Without Borders Benefit For West Africa Relief in NYC, a comedy show raising money for Doctors Without Borders.

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posted 1 day ago on metafilter
Can I learn to knit or crochet with fine motor deficits?I have a slight, from birth, nonprogressive tremor. I can do most things fine, though I do need to be more cautious when slicing and dicing vegetables. It is noticeable enough when people meet me they think I am nervous (only hand tremors) and my writing isn't very legible. I would like to learn to knit or crochet. Is it possible and will one be easier than the other?

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posted 1 day ago on metafilter
Finally able to describe what I do in a way; now I need to sell it. What person do I hire in order to create a message that makes sense to people who hire people with weird yet valuable talent?I have a talent; it is weird and it works. It is in bringing engineering projects together. There isn't a name I know for this but what it involves is managing interfaces, not designs. It is as though I get the negative space in a project and deal with that, not the work breakdown structure. It is more design-oriented than a systems engineer, yet there are elements of both in it. This description doesn't work with people with the ability to hire talent, so I am limited now to working with organizations in which I have been an employee and which know my work. Therefore I need some kind of marketing approach to articulate what I do. The person to define this approach is not exactly a career coach yet as far as I can see, it isn't a marketing consultant either. The person I want to hire can take this approach to engineering, create my elevator pitch and my description of services, and make it somehow compelling. Can you name the unicorn?

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posted 1 day ago on metafilter
The video they don't want you to see: IRREFUTABLE PROOF that Bill Hicks is Alex Jones

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posted 1 day ago on metafilter
Orbits are hard [SLFridayTimeWaster]

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posted 1 day ago on metafilter
Is it possible to get a dog trained to help someone who suffers from episodes of dementia? Specifically, could a dog be trained to help someone who will go for walks without their shoes, keys etc., ending up lost and unsure of how they got there?What places could train a dog to prevent the person from leaving the house when they were in a confused state, or at least stay with them to prevent them from walking out into traffic, help them find their way home and generally make them feel safer when they discovered themselves out and lost again? Ideally these trainers would be in or near Ontario. Traveling for this service, even to the USA is an option. Also, are any breeds recommended for this kind of training? Please assume this person is capable of caring for the dog and has caregivers that can help with any dog related needs.

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posted 1 day ago on metafilter
On Wed Nov 19, 2014, in an awards ceremony emceed by Daniel Handler-aka-Lemony Snicket, Ursula K. Le Guin gave "the most ferocious speech ever given at the National Book Awards." Le Guin's acceptance speech for the Medal for Distinguished Contribution to American Letters touched on the Amazon vs Hachette throwdown and the practice of art in an age of capitalism. Video. Transcription. Right now, I think we need writers who know the difference between production of a market commodity and the practice of an art. The profit motive is often in conflict with the aims of art. We live in capitalism. Its power seems inescapable; so did the divine right of kings.

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posted 1 day ago on metafilter
A close friend and I want to celebrate our birthdays together this winter and are looking for suggestions for a short getaway somewhere near New York City, Boston, or in between. Any recommendations, hivemind?Some details: - We live in NYC and Boston. Anywhere in the greater Boston or NYC area would be good for us, or anywhere in between. We've got a car, so we're not limited to what's accessible by public transit. - We both enjoy the outdoors but we're wimps about weather, so any place that *only* has good scenery and outdoor activities is a no-go. - In terms of activities: we're big readers, theater-goers, and music-listeners/makers. We also love history and science and museums in general. We're planning to spend a day and a half, so quality is more important than quantity in terms of stuff to do. - We'd like to keep this low budget but will entertain all options. :) We've been googling for recommendations but having trouble sorting through the results. Most of the sites that talk about the experience of a particular place are geared towards romantic getaways. We're hoping that MeFites will have some better advice.

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posted 1 day ago on metafilter
I've been reading about various to do/calendar apps, as well as checking older questions on AskMetafilter and have gotten myself thoroughly confusaled and frustrated.What I would like: -- A calendar to note personal appointments such as doctor, dentist, hairstylist, etc. I don't have a lot of these, so the ability to plan in 15 min increments isn't necessarily important. -- A to do list of things I need to be working on as well as: -- A place I can brain dump random stuff like movies I want to see, books I want to read, things I will buy if I win the lottery. -- Ability to sync between my iPhone, iPad and (Windows) desktop. -- If it could be beautiful, that would be a plus. What I don't need: -- Integration with social media -- The ability to share with anyone -- Complex stuff that is more suited to work flows, project management. I don't work, I don't have a significant other, I rarely participate in social media. This is purely to take the place of my beloved paper planner. You guys are the bestest!

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posted 1 day ago on metafilter
Let's change how streaming royalties are calculated, and save the full-length album while we're at it

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posted 1 day ago on metafilter
My uncle (by marriage) has terminal cancer. His doctors have just recommended hospice care. We're medium-close; I see him and his family every couple of years. I live about 300 miles away. What can I do for him? For his wife (my mom's sister) and his grown kids? What can I say? Thank you.

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posted 1 day ago on metafilter
Back in NYC for Christmas and need a good Xmas-dinner restaurant pick. Help?There are some almost-appropriate previous questions about this, but nothing quite spot-on and nothing recent. I'll be back in NYC, a little unexpectedly, for Xmas with the girl, and since everyone I know will be out of town or with family, I think we'll be looking for a good Christmas Eve dinner out. (Christmas day is for Chinese, of course.) What are the best restaurants that you know of for traditional American / European Christmas Eve dinners (turkey or ham or duck etc). I'll also take nouvelle or fusion twists on tradition, here, because Manhattan. Big, big bonus points if you've actually, you know, eaten there. Budget is pretty black, since this probably won't happen again. We're youngish and pretty easy to please. I'm fine with anything from 110th to Battery Park, but I might venture a little out of my comfort zone for a really good idea. I'll obviously make reservations ASAP (I know, I know.)

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posted 1 day ago on metafilter
I'm wondering if there's any academic or research value in the papers my mom kept, documenting her struggles to get a long-term care insurance provider to honour their contract.When my dad was in an assisted living facility, his long-term care insurance covered a portion of the costs. But they did so very reluctantly. The insurance company stonewalled my mom's requests for many months, and only negotiated when Mom escalated to her state's insurance commissioner. The insurance commissioner had to step in multiple times before Dad got his coverage. Mom was very frustrated by this situation. She felt that the insurance company's processes were structurally flawed, and in need of reform. Although Mom tried to get the attention of people with the power to do something, she never did. But maybe it's not too late for somebody to notice? So now my parents are gone, and I have fairly comprehensive paperwork documenting the situation. Are there researchers who would be interested in this as a case study? Perhaps someone in public administration, health care administration, or an advocacy organization? If so, how would I get in touch with them? This happened in the U.S.A., within the last ten years. The paperwork I have includes written correspondence between my mom, the insurance company, and the insurance commissioner. There are also bills from the assisted living facility. From what I can tell, Mom kept everything related to the dispute.

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posted 1 day ago on metafilter
Will I ever get an endorphin rush? I started an incremental exercise program, a couple of weeks doing a basic routine (24 mins a day) and then adding to it, and adding again (finally just under an hour a day). There were resistance bands and lots of sweating, I put a lot of effort in but got no endorphin rush.Am I ever going to feel it? I hate exercising and will take most excuses not to but I stuck with the programme as my therapist and partner both promised there would be a natural rush. I'm seven weeks in and nothing. All I feel is sweaty, tired and yak. The weight loss is not the end goal (though it is nice). This is more about feeling healthier and happier and so far that's not really happening. Does it take a while for the 'high' to kick in, should I just stick it out? Or is it possible that I'll never get the rush?

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posted 1 day ago on metafilter
My bf doesn't like it when I walk home from my job alone, at night. I am a woman. It's not that he won't allow me to, he just thinks it's a bad idea and urges me not to or to carry pepper spray if I do. I had been doing this for over a year before I met him, and want to explain to him why these warnings against it (which I get from others as well) are patronizing and annoying. Or maybe I really am being irresponsible?I live in an extremely, extremely low crime area, i.e., pleasant suburbs. The walk in question is 1 mile, well-lit, with sidewalks. I like it because I work part-time as a waitress and my walk home on nights I work always gives me time to have peace and quiet, unwind, get some fresh air and relax. Also because I work as a waitress, I work shifts that end around 11, so my walks home are always at night. I chafes a bit to have someone issuing me these warnings, because I am an almost 30-year old independent adult. I still do it even though I know he doesn't like it. It chafes me on feminist grounds, as I've (and many other women) heard these admonitions for all kinds of "unsafe" behaviors all through my life. If I told him, "I'm going to keep walking home, and that's that" he would drop it. He's a wonderful person and I know this comes from a place of concern, not control. I just want to have something to say to help him understand why this is important to me. I'd also like help understanding exactly why this is bugging me so much. Part of me thinks, maybe he has a point: something could happen. I just would rather not let some "what-if" fear control my actions and take me away from something I really enjoy. I also feel like if something happened to me, it wouldn't be my fault, but I wonder if people warning me about this would see it that way. Any advice?

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posted 1 day ago on metafilter
A little over two years ago I posted a question regarding a very difficult situation I was in. The result is - eventually after much trauma we got divorced. Two years have passed and whilst in some respects I have made progress, a terrible situation has now occured and I am weighed down with the weight of the world. Desperately need some hivemind perspective if possible.Sorry for the long post I will try and keep this as short as I can. Following the situation discussed in my post back then I decided to go through with divorce. It was incredibly painful and in many ways I am still recoverying. I have recently begun therapy as both me and my ex-wife seem to be having difficulty moving on with our lives. I fought in court for custody of our children and gave it my all but she was able to manipulate and paint herself as a victim of me ignoring the fact I decided to divorce her. It is only with hindsight I see that I was in abusive marriage and that she was the abuser. My ex-wife told me this evening that she is very self-destructive and cannot give love to our children as she does not feel love. Furthermore that she has in recent months become involved with someone who is abusive towards her (she said he hit her and then when I reacted she backtracked and said had not hit her but was abusive and had bitten her and bruised her). She also told me in tears that she knew this person was bad but got weak and invited him to her home that she shares with our children recently. They came in one morning and saw her having sex (they are both at primary school age) and told me she shouted at them. I am incredibly upset and she did not seem to realise how deeply it will have effected them. I know my ex-wife experienced a lot of early childhood trauma and I feel like these destructive patterns of behaviour are a result. She has been on and off medication for many years and is currentlly off them. She told me she knows that she will end up with this person because even though she knows he is bad she is strongly attracted to him and she is not strong enough to reject him. She told me that this was as a result of my abandoning her and that I need to understand the consequences. She also told me she felt suicidal but again after I reacted she downplayed it and said she did not mean it. I know this is absolutely emotional blackmail and manipulation, but, I also believe her entirely that she is seeing this person and he is the way she has portrayed. I know I am being manipulated but also that my ex-wife who I still feel very strongly for is in a world of pain. My immediate priority is my children and I want to take them away from that environment. I want her to get professional help but know I cannot make her. She seems to think the solution is me moving back in and protecting her/looking after her and our children. I know it is easy to say she is just trying to get me back but the destructive behaviour is real. She is deeply damaged and our children are undoubtedly suffering. I want more than anything to protect them and to help my ex-wife. I miss my children so much it is unbearable at times. In my weakest moments I wonder if the best thing for my children is to try again and cope with the behaviour come what may? The reality is overwhelming. (Throwaway email - veryhurtandconfused@gmail.com)

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posted 1 day ago on metafilter
This morning, a relative called saying I had sent them spam from my Gmail account. I ran to the computer, checked Gmail's login history, but found nothing suspicious. I checked the spam folder, and sure enough, two pieces of spam with a link to a phishing site which Safari immediately picked up as such (I know, bad idea to click it at all) had been sent to every one of my contacts. I know anyone can spoof anyone else's email, despite the best attempts at protection by Gmail and such. My question is: how did they get my contacts? How can I make this spoofing harder, or at least prevent access to my contacts in the future? (Further details inside.)The exact same thing happened a few months ago, and in fact, seems to have happened to another MeFite (). Based on the headers, these asshats seem to be in a different place in Europe each time, including England, Spain, and Italy. (I'm in the US, and haven't been to any of those countries in years.) I looked in Gmail's "revoke" menu, but didn't find any suspicious-looking applications, just my phone and Google Voice. I've done the "sign out of all Gmail sessions". No viruses or malware on any computer that I've used in the past year. I'm not one to log in recklessly from public computers. There WAS an incident of a hacked email on the network of an organization that I belong to.

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posted 1 day ago on metafilter
I have a non-American friend who has an undergraduate degree in Aerospace Engineering from a highly acclaimed non-American university and a couple of years of work experience in his home country as a mechanical engineer working on helicopters, airplanes and drones. He now wants to come to the US (any city) for a couple of years (at least) to work as a mechanical engineer in aerospace, preferably on drones. Does anyone know of any specific headhunting firms that specialize in placing aerospace engineers?

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posted 1 day ago on metafilter
Each year, my office (~1500 people) pools together to give our building support staff (cafeteria workers, cleaners, mail room) a holiday gift. It's a tradition that's been going on for as long as I've worked in this office, and this year it's my turn to collect the gift. I'm looking for the best method of collecting the gift.The amount of money we collect is substantial: it was something around $25000. Split among our 110-or-so support staff, it turned out to be a nice holiday gift for all of them. I'm looking for a solution that will allow me to raise this money with reasonably low overhead (e.g. fees, any sort of tax or legal obligations). Last year we used pay-by-gmail and, while that worked, I'd prefer something that has a more traditional model. Any advice about particular websites that would be appropriate would be appreciated. Please don't suggest cash: with this amount of money it's a non-starter. Any advice on resources for legal or tax implications are welcome.

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posted 1 day ago on metafilter
A new paper in the journal Psychological Science in the Public Interest Provides a detailed and comprehensive look at the gender gap between men and women in academic science. Their (surprisingly optimistic?) conclusion?: Barriers to women's full participation in mathematically intensive academic science fields are rooted in pre-college factors and the subsequent likelihood of majoring in these fields, and future research should focus on these barriers rather than misdirecting attention toward historical barriers that no longer account for women's underrepresentation in academic science.

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posted 1 day ago on metafilter
What the hell do we do for all-day in the rain on Saturday. Difficulty level: 2 bum knees, not really a SAM crowd, and sadly, sushi is out (low experimental eaters)We are heading to Seattle this weekend with a small group of newish friends. Normally, my girlfriend and I drop in, do what we want and then go home, a quick 30 minute drive away. HOWEVER, the Out of Towners don't frequent the city, so we have a hotel for Saturday and tickets for a brunch show on Sunday. We also have drinking and dancing covered on Sat night. Food rec for reasonably priced, no dress-up required eateries that serve fine items like a decent steak and Coors Light (as long as they have good vodka, too) On the to-do list: the Space Needle, The Wildrose and Mimosas with Mama.

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posted 2 days ago on metafilter
Last night, a 28 year old man named Akai Gurley was shot to death in a stairwell by an NYPD officer who was patrolling the Pink Houses in East New York. Gurley and his girlfriend had decided to take the stairs because the elevator was taking too long. Police Commissioner Bratton said today that the victim was "a total innocent" and called the shooting "an unfortunate accident." The 27 year old officer who shot Gurley, Peter Liang, has been on the force for less than 18 months and was on probationary status; he and his partner were patrolling the apartment building on assignment as part of Operation Impact, which brings additional officers into neighborhoods that are prone to violent crimes MotherJones (from 2011): "For more than seven years, the first assignment for nearly all rookie New York City police officers has been to patrol "impact zones" with the highest crime rates, often on foot and without backup; In January, 2014, Police Commissioner William J. Bratton said that he planned to no longer send rookie officers immediately into impact zones. "I think they would benefit from it, working with officers in traditional precinct assignments," he said." This past summer, "Mayor Bill de Blasio announced that an additional $87 million added to his (now) $210.5 million citywide plan to make public housing developments safer." The mayor "told reporters Friday, according to Capital New York, that the shooting of Gurley "does appear to have been an accident" and that people shouldn't "connect all the dots" between Gurley, [Michael] Brown and [Eric] Garner." (Garner, previously)

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posted 2 days ago on metafilter
I would like to give a few members of my firehouse each a small, folding utility knife, engraved with their name, as a gift. Because I'm getting several of them, I'd like to keep costs under $35 or so. I've looked at Benchmade and Buck, as I have each of those brands and have found their quality to be good, but I'd like to find the absolute best knife I can for the price. Extreme durability under conditions of brutal misuse is a plus.The style most often carried by the firefighters with whom I work is a small folding knife with a pocket clip and locking blade, sometimes with a serrated edge (I prefer a serrated edge on mine, but it takes all kinds). These are used for a variety of station tasks, but not on emergency calls. One example I've considered is the Buck Nobleman. There are many "tactical" knives out there that are all about style, with pointless greebling meant to evoke firearms or god knows what. I'm not interested in that. I want a substantial, tough knife that looks and feels like it will last. I would love to hear your experiences with other folding utility knives, particularly if there's an easy, inexpensive means of having them individually engraved.

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posted 2 days ago on metafilter
Sally Horner was abducted by Frank La Salle in 1958. In Vladimir Nabokov's Lolita, Humbert Humbert asks: "Had I done to Dolly, perhaps, what Frank Lasalle [sic], a fifty-year-old mechanic, had done to eleven-year-old Sally Horner in 1948?" In Hazlitt magazine, Sarah Weinman tells the whole story & explores the similarities between Sally & Dolly. [potential triggers]

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posted 2 days ago on metafilter
I want to move from the South to the Bay Area, but I'm an administrative assistant. Is anyone going to hire someone like me who has to relocate?I have a bachelor's degree, a solid work history, and an ability to sell myself pretty well at an interview, which in theory should be enough to get me a different job like the one I have now. I live across the country from the jobs where I want to live, though. Will any recruiters seriously consider someone who has to move for pink-collar labor? It seems like with a relatively common, low-prestige skillset, they'll just hire someone local, even if they don't interview as well. I have a good support network there and know what sort of money I need to make, so please don't worry for me about whether it's wise -- if I can't get a suitable job, I just won't move. Have any of you made this kind of move? How did you do it? Do you think it's impossible? How can I spin this positively? Will being a Skype interviewee make me look bad against the in-person interviewees, even if I get there? Bonus: will being from the South hurt me?

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