posted about 10 hours ago on metafilter
The award-winners and top 100 entries from the Audubon Society's annual Photography Awards. That is all.

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posted about 10 hours ago on metafilter
University of Bonn research assistant Erik Wade informs us of a hitherto little-known clade: Thread: everyone knows that medieval art is filled with snails fighting knights, but there's actually a whole medieval snail ecology and society, from snail-birds to snail-monks. And, ofc, snail-cats. Twitter | Threadreader

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posted about 10 hours ago on metafilter
Unfortunately, I became a member of this club several years ago. I now want to apply for Social Security widow's benefits (not SSI disability), but I'm having trouble with a question about living arrangements.Question 16 on Form SSA-10 asks for "Reason you were apart at time of death." Technically, spouse was hospitalized at time of death, and I could choose that as the reason and fill in the name of the illness. However, in the months leading up to that, we had separate permanent addresses, which I'm sure is on record, since spouse was receiving disability. Any suggestions for a brief but truthful answer that will avoid the extremely painful topic of the divorce that never happened and ensure a favorable outcome to my benefit application?

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posted about 10 hours ago on metafilter
The monster in this case is not one person, it was created when lots of people, even with great intentions, publicly disagreed with you at the same time. Even kind feedback can come off as caustic and mean when there is a mob of people behind it. No matter how nicely they say it, when a large group of people you really respect publicly challenge something you've done it can feel like a personal attack. 1600 words from Sara Chipps at Stack Overflow.

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posted about 10 hours ago on metafilter
Preferably movies. Gold star would be romantic exes learning to be uncomplicated friends, but I would also love friendships or other relationships ending, moving on from someone completely, messy stops and starts, anything that doesn't involve a couple getting back together at any point. What are your favorites?

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posted about 10 hours ago on metafilter
Former college and professional football quarterback Jared Lorenzen has passed away at the age of 38. Known as "The Pillsbury Throwboy" and "The Battleship Lorenzen" for his size as a quarterback, his most notable contribution to pop culture was serving as the inspiration for CLARENCE BEEFTANK in Jon Bois' Breaking Madden series. Unsurprisingly, Bois has written a touching eulogy for Lorenzen and the feats he was capable of on the field.

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posted about 11 hours ago on metafilter
I have a very annoying abrasion on the back of my thigh that is getting infected and not healing. What do I do?From cycling, I have a small abrasion (no bigger than a quarter) on the back of my thigh near my butt, near the "crease" where your thigh starts turning into your butt. It's like a few layers of skin rubbed off from friction, leaving an open sore. The abrasion is right where I sit. I think it is getting infected/not healing, though I am washing it and putting antiseptic powder on it. Frankly, I think the problem is sweat/moisture from sitting all day and possibly also the toilet seat and bacteria (ew). If I could just slap a band-aid on it, i would, but it is in such a difficult place for that - the skin in this area moves around and also, hair (ew). How can I cover this wound and let it heal? Wrap the whole thigh with gauze and put a pad under that? Is there some easier solution?

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posted about 11 hours ago on metafilter
I have a relatively new group of friends at work where two people in it struggle with eating. I don't have experience with these issues but want to learn how best to support them. They are both smart people and are able to navigate the nuances of the accessing NHS services. But what can I do to help, and avoid doing that would cause more problems?One friend A has had these issues for a long timer but has a solid and stable support structure. I am less worried about her right now. The other friend B is has the early signs of bulimia. She is starting to talk about it and reach out, but I can tell that it is really hard for her to talk about it. B actions can have a serious triggering affect for A and so it's important for me to be sensitive of this. We are becoming close friends and I feel as though I am in a good position to help them tackle their issues. We work together and often eat lunch together. I would like to read something about the experiences of having an eating disorder, particularly bulimia. I am also looking for guidance on how best to support someone who is showing the early signs rather than waiting for a full crisis. If location is relevant to your answer I am based in the UK. Finally, any tips that might help me talk to them about their issues without doing more harm would be welcome. I don't want to avoid the topic. Thanks!

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posted about 11 hours ago on metafilter
How do content creators do CRM?I'm producing "content" and various interested parties contact me over various platforms -- Twitter, Patreon, email, etc. I'm wondering how content creators keep track of their fans and their interests and communicate effectively. I could put everyone in a spreadsheet. Or is there a MailChimp-like tool that integrates everything? Obviously there would be privacy concerns snarfing everyone's info in a central database that would have to be considered. Or I could stop overthinking and log into each tool and communicate one-at-a-time. Perhaps what I really need is a overarching strategy for keeping people interested in my work, and not neccessarily a tool? My content is fiddly programming stuff, so people range from "this looks cool I should learn it sometime" to people making their own things using my methods. I'd like to engage them with both big content dumps and little content dumps, and point them to websites where I sell them books and stuff.

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posted about 11 hours ago on metafilter
The story of the invention of the black box flight recorder with subterfuge and ridicule. And stubbornness and humour.

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posted about 11 hours ago on metafilter
There are fascinators, and then there are fascinators. Maor Zabar makes hats that really stand out, from sea creatures to bugs to fast food. He also has a shop on Etsy - but the prices are high.

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posted about 11 hours ago on metafilter
I occasionally find myself singing the chorus to a song I remember from a childhood movie. I finally googled the lyrics and I now know is actually a real song, covered by a few singers. But I can't find the movie I learned it from.I only knew these words of the chorus: "Feudin' and fussin' and a-fightin' / Sometimes it gets to be exciting / Don't like them ornery neighbors down by the creek / we'll be plumb out of neighbors next weeeeeeek"., And I that chorus, sung once, was all that was in the film (like an intro to the fighting characters?). It was sung at a pretty fast pace, by a group of people who (in my memory anyway) were actually fighting or started to do so afterwards. I think it was from a movie, but it could also be a TV variety show. This would have been in the 70's or early 80's, so it could be anything from a film to some 1950's short piece on Wonderful World of Disney on TV. Things I thought I heard it from, but am now fairly certain I didn't: the original Pete's Dragon, the Disney World version of Country Bears Jamboree. I feel like it was either a combination of live action and animation, or something like the Country Bears where it's live action but might as well be animated. I know this is a long shot, but I would love to be able to find out.

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posted about 11 hours ago on metafilter
Otamere Guobadia writes for Dazed about sexual fluidity, in his own life and in our expectations of celebrities who come out (or don't). "Man" and "woman" as described in our sexual orientations are not only necessarily imperfect characterisations, but they are flexible and porous categories; in our lifetimes and indeed in our everyday, our desires weave many times in and out of them. I have desired bodies that both uphold these categories, and bodies that fail them entirely, and everybody in between. I have had men wolf whistle at my skinny jean-clad legs as I walked down the stairs of a double decker bus, only for their leering to turn to agitation and anger when the rest of my torso came into view. Desire is a silly and changeable thing. If you like this, you might like the rest of Guobadia's "Chocolate-Cream Soldier" column for Dazed or his thoughts on London Pride for the Guardian.,

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posted about 11 hours ago on metafilter
Hollis B.Worth, (née Anne Hollister Bulleit) is known to thousands in the spirits industry as the "First Lady of Bourbon" and as the face of the Bulleit brand that is named after her family. But, in 2017 she and Bulleit's parent company, Diageo, parted ways. It wasn't amicable. In her first interview since the split, Hollis talked with Neat Pour about an alleged pattern of homophobic harassment that started in her own family and bled into her work environment at Diageo, the $12 billion multinational beverage company that also owns about 30 other brands including Tanqueray, Johnnie Walker, Ketel One, and Smirnoff.

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posted about 11 hours ago on metafilter
I don't know enough Polish to try to hunt this down. I've tried looking in all the obvious places (amazon, etc).Here's what the book looks like. I don't care about price and I have lots of time.

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posted about 12 hours ago on metafilter
In the 1980s, One of the World's Cellphone Hot Spots Was ... Zaire Now known as the Democratic Republic of Congo or DRC

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posted about 12 hours ago on metafilter
I have started writing book reviews on a freelance basis for literary journals and would love recommendations for books that deal with how to write a decent review. A collection of book reviews would be great too. PS: I enjoy reading reviews on the NYT and New Yorker.

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posted about 12 hours ago on metafilter
This epposide of my favorite WFMU show is a three-hour fever dream.

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posted about 12 hours ago on metafilter
An Ode to 'On the Beach,' Neil Young's Most Beautiful (and Most Depressing) Album Forty-five years after its release, Young's melancholic search for meaning in a chaotic world feels more relatable than ever. Walk On See the Sky About to Rain Revolution Blues For the Turnstiles Vampire Blues On the Beach Motion Pictures Ambulance Blues

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posted about 12 hours ago on metafilter
What structured activities do you do with your significant other to add meaning and joy in your life? I'm looking for things that are reoccurring: daily, weekly, monthly, yearly, or seasonally.From sitting down each month and plotting out a menu and shopping list to hosting a Passover Seder for friends each year. Specific is good. Perhaps monthly you sit down with your partner and take stock of what is working/not between you--but how do you structure it? I'm looking for quirky variety. Thank you!

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posted about 12 hours ago on metafilter
Should I stop developing crushes? If so, how?This was me. I got the new job. Though things with my crush are not perfect they are approximately 1000% better now I don't have to see them every day. Seems good! The only little issue is that I think I am developing a new crush, what I expect will be a much more manageable one, but I still feel ridiculous about it. I guess I have a lifelong habit of developing these crushes, though never to such an upsetting degree as the one I asked the question about. (Well, not since I was thirteen, anyway.) Sorry if this question is too chatfiltery but: Is it bad to keep developing crushes on people (assuming you don't act on them inappropriately)? Are there effective ways to stop? I feel kind of sad that I'm apparently incapable of parsing a social situation without manufacturing some sort of crush for it. I worry that this habit makes me miss out on connections with people who aren't my crush. Most of the other new people I have met are way cooler than my new crush and we probably have way more in common but I've caught myself orienting my attention crushward anyway. Ugh.

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posted about 12 hours ago on metafilter
I edit content for a company's blog and continually run into misconceptions and strongly held beliefs that doing X, Y, or Z is "good for SEO" and finding actual evidence of this is difficult. Specifically, I'm trying to determine if there's any truth to the widespread idea that "cross-linking helps SEO." What happens next will shock you. Um, I mean, please read on for details.So I edit (and write, but less relevant to the question) a variety of content written by folks that range from developers, field support or sales, product marketing, product management, communications, executives, and so on. For various reasons, we're conservative about including links. This ranges from legal not wanting to link to certain material to folks wanting to slip in links that are less than professional, or just turning a piece of content into a linkfest where every other word is linked to something for no good reason. Often removing links is met with "but it's good for SEO!" I don't claim to be an SEO expert, but I know that inbound links from relevant / authoritative sites can help with search ranking. I've seen some material that suggests if you have multiple domains that are related, cross-linking between them can be a strategy that helps boost ranking. But most of what I've found suggests that just linking out to sites just to do it, even if they're related in topic, will not help us with ranking. It may help the outbound site, but not us. What I'm looking for is some hard data or current references that will either dispute this belief, or show me the data and convince me we're doing it wrong. Obviously I want to get the most traffic possible, so if we do benefit from cross-linking I'd like to know about it.

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posted about 13 hours ago on metafilter
For people who are fluently bilingual in both American English and a language with gendered nouns (specifically interested in French, but others please chip in): What's the closest English equivalent (if one exists) to what it it feels like when someone misgenders a noun?Let's say that I (as a non-native speaker) mis-gender a noun in a language with gendered nouns. Is there any way to explain what that sounds like / feels like to you as it relates to the violation of a language rule in American English? Some examples of what I mean would be explaining it as "it's like using I instead of me - e.g. They gave the fish to I", or "it's like dropping `the` when referring to something - e.g. I found it at library", or "it's like mis-gendering a person - e.g. I saw my father and she was well." I'm sure there's no direct equivalent of the feeling, but is there anything close?

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posted about 13 hours ago on metafilter
Hi! I have some bike-short type things I wear under dresses in the summer, but I want some better ones. I have specific desires. Help me find the perfect pair?I keep trying to find the perfect shorts to wear under dresses, but I haven't found them yet. I am currently wearing these which are...fine. My issues with these: They only come in light blue and black. I would like some that come in a variety of colors, including nude-colored or blush pink. The shipping for this $15 set is also $15, so ordering two would cost me $60, so that's a no. I'd like to not spend a lot of money. The material isn't very slick (even though they're nylon?), so my cotton and linen dresses get stuck up on the friction between the materials. I DO like that these are very breathable and that the high waist isn't trying to squeeze me into a sausage. The perfect short: Breathable so my junk can breathe in this swampy city weather Medium to high waisted but NOT body-contouring or tight shapewear Leg inseam at least 5 inches long (no boyshorts) A slick frictionless material so my clothing doesn't get stuck up on it (I feel like cotton or jersey shorts will not work in this instance, but maybe I'm wrong?) Flush against the skin (no boxers or boxer-briefs or anything flowy, I don't want any visible bunching) Will fit a size 12ish woman Costs less than $20 each, including shipping, although if you share some that check every other box, I'll consider. Available online and returnable if unsatisfied. Members of the Chub Rub Club, have you any recommendations? Appreciate your help!

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posted about 13 hours ago on metafilter
I believe that I might be in for a spell of anxiety in the future. What can I do to nip my anxious thoughts and feelings in the bud before they become an actual problem?I can sense the beginnings of a spell of anxiety. I have had serious depression/anxiety before and in each case, the symptoms were there for months in advance, I just didn't really pay attention. But now I am and I'd like to nip things in the bud before it becomes a problem. What I'm noticing at the moment is a tendency to overthink social and work interactions way more than I usually would, and I mean really overthink - I can panic myself into a spiral over things that normally I wouldn't necessarily think about that much because I have never normally thought of myself as a socially anxious person. "Maybe I shouldn't have done that thing, maybe I shouldn't have said that thing, I'm sure everybody hates me." I feel like my filter doesn't work as well as it normally does so I'm much more likely these days to blurt out something and then spend days and days regretting it (like recently when my boss said something I disagreed with and instead of politely disagreeing I just went: "WHY?" Ugh, the memory still gives me a whole body shudder.) Usually, I am much more careful and composed. I have also mentioned elsewhere on metafilter my wonderful/terrible current crush (the most intense I have ever experienced in my life) which is of course feeding the anxiety -"I shouldn't have said that to that person, what did that micro-expression of theirs mean, I'm sure they hate me." Even though I know they don't. I've written elsewhere on metafilter about my quite active social life and large, healthy network of friends - however, I feel like the people who usually calm and ground me aren't as available as they used to be (they've had babies) and the people I do have access to are people who, in some way or the other, stimulate me and feed my anxiety. A lot of the stressful interactions I describe are work interactions. I'm going on holiday soon, which may do something to reset. I'd feel a lot better if I could just ground myself with a rest and a cup of tea with people who calm me. In the absence of that, what can I do to calm myself really deeply? I find meditation not at all useful for my purposes. I already exercise, although work obligations over the summer have made it hard for me to sustain my exercise routine - and I find the calming effects of an exercise session does not last long at all. TIA, Mefites.

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