posted less than an hour ago on metafilter
I'm Marie Fucking Kondo and You Can Keep All Your Fucking Books, You Ingrates

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posted about 2 hours ago on metafilter
Just like the title says -- I'm looking for the highest and lowest recorded temperatures for the entire US on a couple of dates in the recent past -- specifically the 19th and the 20th of January, 2019. The data on the NOAA website excludes Alaska and Hawaii, but I want those states included.

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posted about 3 hours ago on metafilter
Besides being frigid, and having to leave the state for Target and Starbucks, tell me about Brattleboro.My daughter will be spending some time in Brattleboro for a least the next several weeks. I will be driving back and forth from NJ to see her. I will eventually need to at least get her a haircut. I will also need ideas for places to eat by myself, or maybe quick bites with her. I plan on spending the night when I come up for visits. I've been told that the trip from NYC is roughly 3-1/2hrs, but I'm anticipating maybe closer to 4 with traffic and crappy road conditions? Best to take Rt 15 to Rt 91? I really would like to avoid 95 unless there's a reason not to. Thanks!

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posted about 3 hours ago on metafilter
Office Space - the oral history.

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posted about 3 hours ago on metafilter
I detest bras. I've been wearing Express's camis with shelf bras every day for the past 7 or so years, and love them. Now I'm halfway through my pregnancy, managing with the same camis sized up. Two questions: (1) will they sustain me for the third trimester, or should I look for maternity options? (2) is there a good nursing cami on the market that's similar -- cotton, firm shelf bra, soft, full torso coverage?

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posted about 4 hours ago on metafilter
I'm looking for what I think is a thermogenic supplement (or possibly a pre-workout supplement or vitamin/herbal supplement?). They appear to be expensive, with aggressive over-promising marketing, so I'd only like to fork over the cash for something likely to work. The results I'd like, in order of priority, are:(1) Feeling physically warmer (I run cold in terms of temperature, and have my whole life: I currently live somewhere where I don't control the heat, and I wear two heavy fleeces inside, despite being physically active in general) (2) Mental clarity/focus (3) Fat burning (am at a healthy weight but have some fat to lose) (4) Something can push me harder during my workouts (resistance training 3x/week). Does such a product exist, and/or has anyone had any success with any particular products on the market? Also, how do these things work? The whole reason I thought of such a purchase was that I was at GNC buying Quest bars and feeling cold, and the sales guy mentioned that he's taking Slimvance and he feels physically warmer, which sounded appealing. I'm open to one-off supplements (e.g. yohimbe was recommended to me), or pills that are a mix of things - anything effective, really. I'm also open to taking more than one product to address my different concerns. I'm possibly nervous about large amounts of caffeine or similar stimulants (took ungodly amounts of caffeine as an undergrad to pull all-nighters, which resulted in heart racing and anxiety). Brands I've heard mentioned include Hydroxycut, Cellucor, Slimvance, and Quadralean, so any feedback - positive or negative - about your personal experiences with any of those or others would be appreciated.

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posted about 5 hours ago on metafilter
In 1933, Florence Price became the first African-American woman to have her music performed by a major orchestra. Price died in 1953, and while much of her work was lost over the years, her legacy was not forgotten. Good fortune struck in 2009, when nearly 30 boxes of her manuscripts and papers--including dozens of scores thought to be long gone--were found, as The New Yorker reports. NPR's All Things Considered explores Price's music, which is described as a blend of African-American and European styles, including musical allusions to Dvořák, African folk traditions, and spirituals. Composer Jordan Randall Smith offers an excellent roundup, and cautions against the use of the term "rediscovered." (Previously on Metafilter: Violin videos: Women playing music written by women)

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posted about 5 hours ago on metafilter
I made chicken stock in my instant pot and forgot about it until the next morning. Do we think it's safe to eat?- ingredients were a chicken carcass and some veggie trimmings - ingredients came from the freezer - chicken carcass was put in the freezer within 2hrs of the bird originally coming out of the oven - stock was cooked on high pressure in instant pot - instant pot was turned fully off after several hours of cooking (so it was not on Keep Warm overnight) - lid was on instant pot overnight - when I opened it in the morning, liquid was lukewarm and smelled delicious

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posted about 6 hours ago on metafilter
I recently read Circe by Madeline Miller, and I realized I have a huge knowledge gap when it comes to Greek and Roman mythology. I know almost nothing. Please help me get up to speed!I'm an adult with a good brain but a short attention span. Where should I start? Should I read the Illiad? Which translation? Then what? All advice or suggestions appreciated.

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posted about 6 hours ago on metafilter
(or should I just get a Google Pixel and deal with the annoying headphone situation?)I'm a few weeks away from going on a two-month long epic trip through several counties, and I need to get a new phone before I go (my old Nexus 5 is on its last legs). Because I don't want to bring my DSLR with me, I thought I might go for the Google Pixel because of the camera (I especially love the night mode.) After spending a lot of time researching though, I feel like the lack of headphone jack is a dealbreaker. I mainly use my phone for taking photos, making calls, and listening to music. I feel like wired headphones are more reliable, and I don't want to deal with having another thing to charge, or a dongle that could get lost. It seems like a lot of people are frustrated with new phones not having a headphone jack. Wondering if anyone has faced the same dilemma? Do you love your android phone that has both a camera and headphone jack? I've read the Verge, Wirecutter, Reddit and all kinds of review sites but I'm getting overwhelmed by this decision and would love to hear from my favourite community. I'm in Canada and not on a plan so will be buying the phone outright. Thanks in advance!

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posted about 6 hours ago on metafilter
Unlike some non-profits, mine is large and well funded, but burnout has been creeping up on me ever since a co-worker passed away a couple of years ago. However, my burnout is pretty high-functioning and difficult for others to see. How can I persuade management to see that I have a real problem?Quitting is not a great option right now as my partner might be out of a job in a few months. A crappy job is still a necessary one. I'm weathering burnout amidst a perfect storm of factors: - 5+ year job itch - mid-career slump - 40s, peri-menopausal - dysfunctional management - death of a co-worker - stagnant career growth with no opportunities - department wide low morale - feeling that I don't belong there plus increasing isolation and distortion It has taken me a long, long time to realize that I was burning out. The wake up call came this past week when I said something better left unsaid out loud plus I also cried almost non-stop during a different meeting with my supervisor. I also have been stealthily crying at work for so long that I can't remember when I started. I'm experiencing grief and burnout on major levels. I still grieve for my co-worker, who was older than me, even though it has been over a year since they passed away. I grieve for the loss of my career as my skills grow stagnant from lack of training. I grieve for the person that I thought I could become through this organization. I'm the only person that does my job and I'm so exhausted. My attempts to make my job part time were rejected and instead more work was heaped on me. There wasn't enough budget to hire for another position, so I do 1.25 jobs. However, work is still being completed and on time. It takes all my energy to appear normal but I'm starting to fail at that. Obviously I am doing a good job, but still feeling like a failure. I feel afraid to go into work most days, even though no one would hurt me there. I told my supervisor months ago that I was burning out and they suggested the employee assistance number. The phone counselor seemed to think I was having a few crappy days and it didn't work out. The phone counselor said I needed to stop thinking about work when I was not at work. For some reason I have also been seeing things that aren't there, like someone is behind me or the sidewalk ripples. I have been too ashamed to confide this in anyone. I tried to talk to my supervisor again about the burnout last week in the same meeting, but they told me that I needed to get a grip on my emotions. As you can see, I am having trouble in the self-regulation department. I cried so much that I actually gave myself a black eye. Who knew? I have been trying to take care of myself as best as I can, eating well, trying to get lots of sleep, etc. I'm not currently on any medications and don't self-medicate. My family life is good and my partner cares about me. I did take time off during the holidays, but it didn't seem to reset or refresh myself. My next step is to see my doctor, but I'm worried that I will get the brush off from him. As people have preconceptions about what depression and burnout look like, how can I persuade others that this is really happening to me? How can I persuade my co-workers that this isn't just a crappy day or week or "every job sucks!"? I read the other non-profit burnout questions on here and I'm not sure they fit my situation, although they do have some good advice. TIA.

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posted about 8 hours ago on metafilter
Historian Kevin M. Kruse recommends: If you're looking for something to watch on MLK today, check out the fantastic "King in the Wilderness" documentary. Amazing footage, much of it not seen before, about the last, often overlooked chapters of King's story. KITW is a 2018 HBO documentary directed by Peter Kunhardt covering the last 18 months of Dr. King's life. (Some reviews from the LA Times, THR, RogerEbert.com.) It has been uploading to YouTube by the Kunhardt Film Foundation, along with the clips and full interviews edited into the film.

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posted about 8 hours ago on metafilter
I was seeing graphics artifacts in Xubuntu 18.04 while using the Nouveau driver. I changed that to the proprietary NVidia driver, then rebooted. When the reboot stalled, I eventually forced the shutdown via power button. Now that I've restarted, I can't see any of my USB drives, udiskie won't start, and "sudo gparted" seems to scan forever without ever showing my disks. Ideas? I need to access my USB drives. Thanks!A sample of the repeating original message during which I originally had to force-shutdown, after the time limit was reached and still no shutdown: "A stop job is running for Session c2 of user [username] [30180401.076.002] ata13.15: exception Emask 0x2 SAct 0x0 SErr 0x800400 action 0x6" Post-reboot, here is the udiskie start error message: https://pastebin.com/DDiCCNiW Thunar is also delayed at startup by about 30s to 1m and opens without showing any USB devices. I have unplugged my USB devices and plugged them back in, and they still don't show up. Even previously-not-plugged-in devices don't show up when plugged in. I made sure that devices are set to auto-mount when plugged in, in Xubuntu Removable Drives and Media settings. All advice appreciated, thank you.

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posted about 8 hours ago on metafilter
My wife has "Becoming" by Michelle Obama in the house but neither of us has had a chance to read it yet. My fifth grade daughter has picked it up and is about 100 pages in and is devouring it. Is there anything in there inappropriate for kids? I'll be skimming it as soon as I can but I wondered if there is anything that jumps out as potentially upsetting for a 10 1/2 year old. She is sensitive - I am going to check out the part on Sandy Hook and probably put a post-it in there so she can skip it or at least come talk about it before she gets into it. Anything else that jumps out for people?

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posted about 8 hours ago on metafilter
Is there anywhere to buy buckeyes in NYC?(I know they're not that hard to make and I may try that, but wanted to see if anyone knows of any professionals! Thanks.)

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posted about 8 hours ago on metafilter
I Needed A Hysterectomy At Age 31. Doctors Fought Me Every Step Of The Way. Ace Ratcliff describes six years of unnecessary pain, suffering and medical bills in pursuit of a hysterectomy. "I ran into roadblocks from the start. Doctors refused to take me seriously when I requested a surgical hysterectomy... And nothing I said could change my doctors' minds, not the stories about my frequently dislocating hips, my mom's complicated pregnancies or the increased rate of miscarriage and preterm labor for EDS patients." I ran into roadblocks from the start. Doctors refused to take me seriously when I requested a surgical hysterectomy. "You're not even 30 yet," they patronizingly told me. "You might change your mind about having children. Your future partner might want children!" Somehow, my personal autonomy, my health and my comfort didn't rate high enough to outrank the desires of my future, then-nonexistent partner. And nothing I said could change my doctors' minds, not the stories about my frequently dislocating hips, my mom's complicated pregnancies or the increased rate of miscarriage and preterm labor for EDS patients. ... What strikes me most about this entire experience is that so much of my pain could have been avoided with a number of easy solutions. Unfortunately, if you think my story is unique, you're wrong: Stories abound of people with female reproductive organs whose pain and health issues weren't taken seriously until they started having fertility issues ― or, inversely, of those whose doctors shrugged off their concerns because taking care of them may have affected their ability to reproduce. Ace Ratcliff previously: Tattoos, Pain, And Incurable Illness The blatantly biased treatment Ratcliff experienced has always been the norm for women seeking medical help, and goes far beyond hysterectomies. Eileen Pollack: Invalid: How the medical establishment undermines, misdiagnoses, and gaslights women What Dusenbery's book makes maddeningly clear is how often women find themselves trapped in illogical paradoxes and self-defeating cycles, even when the people who create those traps are supposedly logical, kindhearted scientists. For decades, older male doctors taught medical students that rich white women feigned their "diseases" because they were bored, desirous of attention, or reluctant to accept their roles as wives and mothers. According to this theory, a middle-class woman who chose to work outside her home was probably suffering the ills brought on by delayed or reduced pregnancies. A woman who wanted to have it all but wasn't smart, talented, or tough enough to achieve her goals would fake a disease that granted her the excuse to give up and stay home. The supposed proof for this assessment was that poor, black, and working-class women never complained of the "diseases" that afflicted their richer, whiter counterparts. Of course, poor women, black women, and working-class women did suffer the same symptoms; they just couldn't afford to visit a doctor. From the earliest times, male physicians dismissed women as too frail or irrational to practice medicine, while not so coincidentally viewing these same women as hypochondriacs who made good-paying clients. In the early 20th century, Freud provided a "scientific" framework for ascribing a woman's complaints to repressed trauma or neuroses, which the patient wouldn't be able to recognize; this allowed doctors to feel fine about their biases even as they couldn't explain why a patient felt the way she felt, let alone cure her. As Dusenbery points out, physicians rarely find out that the women they dismiss as fakers are actually suffering from multiple sclerosis or an autoimmune disease (or, in my case, a spinal cord injury or ruptured ovarian cyst). As a result, most doctors are able to keep believing that their colleagues are the ones making all the misdiagnoses. Women get diagnosed with mental illness more often than men, perhaps because society inflicts more pressures on women, or because mental health professionals are more apt to view women as crazy, or because society discourages men from admitting they have problems. Whatever the cause, if your medical record indicates you are prone to depression, any physical symptoms you profess are more likely to be attributed to your mental illness. Here's the real mindfuck: Medical professionals tend to dismiss as hypochondriacs people who visit doctors frequently, use pain medications excessively, ask for surgery, and generally act in ways an invalid would act—all of which correspond with the behavior of someone who suffers from a real disease no one believes she has. As I wrote the previous paragraph, it occurred to me the word "invalid" is spelled the same as "invalid." Laurie Edwards: The Pain Isn't In Your Head. And Other Truths Of The Female Experience Gender bias in medicine is well-known and deeply ingrained: a disproportionate number of women experience pain conditions, their symptoms are more likely than men's to be considered psychogenic and treated with antidepressants rather than pain medicine, and when women do receive appropriate treatment for symptoms, they wait longer to receive it. We can now add a potential new angle to the gender bias conversation. According to a new report by the International Consortium of Investigative Journalism, when it comes to medical device and implant failures, women face disproportionate harm. There are two key scenarios outlined in the ICIJ report — complications and failures in devices and implants designed for conditions that primarily affect women, including bladder prolapse or breast cancer, and higher complications and failure rates compared to men with devices like heart pumps or artificial hips. But perhaps the most compelling takeaway from the year-long investigation and interviews with patients is that when women reported symptoms and illnesses they suspected were related to their implants, their complaints were dismissed.

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posted about 8 hours ago on metafilter
Wanted: recommendations of public-domain audiobooks for a family member in assisted living.Family member (female, elderly) is in assisted living. For reasons I won't get into here, she can't take advantage of opportunities for social interaction that are nominally available to her. Likewise precluded from reading or using a keyboard, but NOT from using a remote control, provided buttons are large enough. I've acquired an MP3 player with a remote, which has no sound files yet. Seeking recommendations of books in the public domain, and 'prominent' enough to have been recorded into audio files by one or other of the volunteer projects out there (I'm using this, which you can search, but there are others)-- books which you would recommend as enjoyable/thought-provoking/otherwise worth reading, or listening to in this case. (I don't have much specific information about her taste in reading material; aim general.) Also, if you know a really engrossing audiobook which isn't public domain, feel free to post it as well (but mark it as not-public-domain). Also seeking: -any constructive criticism about this project before I ship it -suggestions on how to artificially make a button "easier" to press -any comments/concerns.

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posted about 9 hours ago on metafilter
I have a pretty straightforward separation agreement from my employer. Do I need a lawyer to look it over, and if so, where I can I find a free one?The separation terms are really straightforward and no-fault (they're closing the NYC branch of my company altogether). There's a severance package and such. I do not anticipate anything really wacko in there. But I also don't have the legal wherewithal to be able to spot it if there is, and I also don't have the money to pay for someone to look at it for me. What are my options in NYC?

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posted about 10 hours ago on metafilter
A Student Ate 5 Day Old Pasta For Lunch. This Is How His Liver Shut Down.

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posted about 10 hours ago on metafilter
If it is time for a change, where can I turn? And how can I cope with my current job while looking for something else?As the long weekend comes to a close, I'm feeling the same dread and anixety that I feel at the end of every weekend. Except this time, enough is enough and I want to stop feeling like this. I work in a preschool currently, as a Pre-K teacher. When I was hired, I was told this is a classroom of four-year-olds. After joining, I found out these are three year olds as well, and my boss continues enrolling children who have just turned three, cannot follow the Pre-K curriculum, and disrupt my class whenever I try teaching. A majority of them also have behavioral problems, such as climbing shelves, and throwing toys at each others heads and at teachers as well. I have a coteacher who doesn't do her share of the work. She went on vacation last week when it was her turn to teach without writing any lesson plans, and I wore myself out picking up her slack. Parents complain about my classroom, saying I am disorganized and my room is a mess; not realizing how difficult it is all day. Not realizing that I was duped when I interviewed. My boss blames me, saying I'm not "firm" enough. She knows that I have PCOS and possible fibromyalgia, that I live in pain daily, that I can't work late...yet she keeps me a half hour past my shift daily, due to us being short-staffed. She never gives us planning time, (I was met with silence when I asked), and I end up taking work home in addition to a very long and tiring work day. Not to mention, this place is very ungrateful. I stayed until 8:30 on a Friday a few weeks ago to help organize the classroom, and never even got a thank you. A little background on me: I'm a 30 year old woman and have a Bachelors and Master's in English. My aspiration was to work in a university as an Academic Adviser or in Student Affairs. I haven't been able to get into the field for years, and I finished my degree in 2013. I interviewed for an Enrollment Management position a few years ago, and was declined after three interviews due to not enough relevant experience. I can't wvwn get an Administrative Assistant position in higher education, because of being "overqualified." I find this ridiculous and have therefore stopped looking for the past 8 months or so. I also live alone due to a very abusive family, so all the cooking/cleaning/adulting is on me, in addition to my painful health issues, and anxiety and depression. I also have a significant other who's been with me five years, but still won't move in with me. I don't know where to turn anymore. I'm exhausted, mentally and spiritually. I'm overworked, underpaid, disrespected, worn out, and unfulfilled. I still want a higher ed job, but I don't know if that's meant to be. I've tried for so long. I do enjoy working with kids, so possibly an educational assistant position at an elementary school is an option. I could look for other desk jobs, but I don't know what could be fulfilling for me, and I know I enjoy working with students. I could continue trying to make this current job work, (because I do enjoy the four years olds), but I don't know how to improve the situation. I'm just confused, and would like some help with finding a direction to go in. Thank you in advance.

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posted about 10 hours ago on metafilter
Hello! I keep trying brownie recipes in an attempt to recreate my ideal brownie, as remembered from my youth. I haven't found it yet and I'm getting tired of the wrong brownies. Please help! Specifics inside.Okay, as it says in the title, my perfect brownie is chewy. Not cakey, not fudgy, chewy. Like, with a toothsomeness throughout the whole brownie. The edges (which are the best part, and I have an all-edge brownie pan because of it) are even chewier, but not super crisp or dried out. The top is that crackly brownie thing that sometimes happens. NO ganache, frosting, chocolate chips, nuts, etc. Just chewy brownies. I've heard that the only way to get this is with a box, so I got a box of Girardelli brownie mix and tried that and they weren't right. Not chewy enough, no crackly top. Granted, I may have underbaked them slightly, because the box said DO NOT OVERBAKE! BROWNIES WILL APPEAR UNDERDONE and I believed them. But it didn't really seem like another 5 or 10 minutes would have turned them into what I wanted. So, is there a recipe out there that gives me my perfect brownies? Or a box mix that you know works? Should I just not stress about the overbaking thing and leave them in for longer? Thanks!

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posted about 10 hours ago on metafilter
"I was having a hard time not staring at the tube of flesh wrapped so tightly and held so firmly against his left thigh, as it lay against his firm hairy pelvis and angled up and to the left." "I figured it was only fair for me to try some gay erotica by a gay author. And there's never been a gayer pen name than B.J. Twink, whose name is so gay, when you type it into Google, porn comes up. I don't know how any of the other six Str8 2 Gays are, but Str8 2 Gay#4 was, uh, bizzare. Reading like a bland diary entry, the protagonist details an uneventful slice-of-life where he goes over to his friends Rick and Becky's house to swim. Sandy, another man, is also there. He jumps in the pool, eats hot dogs and stares at Rick and Sandy's junk. Then he goes home. And then Becky's dad has to get surgery, so B.J. goes over and skinny-dips with Rick while she's gone. That's it. Worst line: "I was having a hard time not staring at the tube of flesh wrapped so tightly and held so firmly against his left thigh, as it lay against his firm hairy pelvis and angled up and to the left." By Zachary Shucklin

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posted about 10 hours ago on metafilter
Beauty and miseries of the human/animal soul in a digital-romantic key. [NSFW] The female figure as the primary source of inspiration, with all its irresistible sensuality of forms and chameleon quality. This is the vision by Robin Isely [NSFW], a refined collage artist who lives on an island in the Bay of San Francisco, California, not far from where he grew up.

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posted about 11 hours ago on metafilter
Mr. Mysticle and I have just begun mentoring a 12 year old boy. He likes math. (He also likes cooking, baking, and basketball.) For our first hangout, we all had fun building bridges with marshmallows and toothpicks and then testing how much they could hold without buckling. What are some other activities/projects that would be fun, new, and exciting?FWIW, he has limited access to activities, field trips, and enrichment. Also, the program we're working with has suggested keeping things fun and mellow for the first few months-- not anything that would feel too much like homework or school. Also, we'd like to keep things not too expensive. Thanks!

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posted about 11 hours ago on metafilter
Any gazebo experts in the crowd?This gazebo predated our purchase of the house. In a recent spate of mild wind, our cover tore to pieces. Enter the real tragedy - we threw away the cover without looking at the tag or identifying the manufacturer. Now as I begin the process of looking for a replacement, I realize that was foolish, because I have no idea what model of gazebo this is, and the canopies seem to assume that you will know this critical piece of information. Sigh. Any gazebo experts in the crowd that can help me identify this model of gazebo? Or otherwise advise on how to know I'm ordering a replacement canopy that will actually work? Pic two. Thanks for any help you can provide.

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